You're right, Jezzie51. Decaf makes sense, although not eating means less energy, and that's where the caf is useful. Nevertheless, I'll consider decaf more.
I am hungry, but my self loathing causes me not to eat much, just crackers or bread to settle the stomach a bit. Kind of punishing myself, I guess.
I'm being moved to a psych bed upstairs. Still voluntary, but have been told that if staff consider me not ready to leave, and I try, my stay becomes involuntary. They are worried about
my family's suicide history, and mine, too. My wife wants me to stay, too. Could be a few days, or weeks (yikes!).
Feeling very uneasy, but understand their position. I'm not a raving lunatic, but I have had a distressing weekend, filled with plans of ending my life.
I feel OK now, and want to go home. But everyone wants me to stay, so I'll stay. They nursing staff are professional and caring. Some of the docs so far, well, we might butt heads. I'll listen, but I won't be jerked around (treated impolitely...poor bedside manner). We'll see.
This is all overwhelming, but so is wanting to die. Getting to hospital was a prudent move.