Stuck Inside my Own Head.

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New Member

Date Joined Mar 2009
Total Posts : 2
   Posted 3/18/2009 10:27 AM (GMT -6)   
I'm Fate, please only call me Fate. I've been depressed through out my life, sometimes it goes away on it's own. This time the depression seems to be too intense, and I've noticed that I'm developing aggression and anger with this depression. I've been in a relationship for 7 months now, and this is my first serious relationship. My boyfriend and I are considering settling down within a year or two, but he tells me if I don't change he will leave me. I keep blaming everything on him, but it's not just him who has problems, it's me too. He's stopped calling me, talking to me, visiting me, it's as if I'm just some girl he calls his girlfriend. At the end of the day he's not there for me...I miss that. I've also been fired from a job that I worked extremely hard to get, and I was very professional for the job, I had all the training and recommendations I had it all...but they fired me because I didn't fit their image. Now I'm jobless, living in my first ever apartment, on my own for the first time. I'm scared of whats to come and I'm not sure what to do. I can't even finish college because I can't afford it. What I was paying for college came out of my there's nothing. I couldn't even buy a cheese burger from McDonalds if you asked me to. My roommate...she drives me absolutely nuts as well. Everyone tells me I should stand up for myself ( She is a smart *** ) She also likes to do a lot of things without even bothering to ask me if it's alright with me, nor does she pay me her half of the rent. ( She's on the lease ) That's another thing that makes my boyfriend upset with me. I try my darnedest to avoid confrontation at this critical point in my life. My emotions are too risky for me to continue living the life that I am. I've even gone back to. I never thought I would do these things again...All alone I can't mend. I have so much more on my mind...I just need one person to talk person that can say "It's going to be okay." At this point...I can't even save me from myself. : cry

Post Edited By Moderator (getting by) : 3/18/2009 9:57:50 AM (GMT-6)

getting by
Forum Moderator

Date Joined Sep 2007
Total Posts : 42609
   Posted 3/18/2009 10:57 AM (GMT -6)   
Hi Fate,

Please don't be so hard on yourself. You are trying. That is all that matters. I am sorry that your roommate isn't paying her share of the rent. Have you asked her to leave? You might need to look for another roomate at this point.

I hope that you can get the help that you need. What you are doing is only going to make things worse for you. Are you taking any medications or going to counseling? I think that it is time that you think about that.

Either way, stick with us. This is a good place to come and vent. And seek advice. We all care about eachother here, so now you are a part of our family.

Keep posting and remember we are here for you.

Hugs, Karen
  Moderator-Depression and fibromyalgia
fibromyalgia, Chronic fatigue, depression,allergies

New Member

Date Joined Mar 2009
Total Posts : 2
   Posted 3/18/2009 11:00 AM (GMT -6)   
Yeah, I know it's not good for me. Which is my whole point of coming here. I have more problems than what I listed above, but I only want to tackle one at a time. I'm not much for therapy and I can't afford any for the simple reason I don't have a job, nor transportation...
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