It took me a while to get to your post....I had a lot of catching up to do when I logged on!
I have dealt with depression for many years, as is the case for many of us on this board. It sounds to me like you've had an awful lot of stuff going on in your life, and I'm wondering if there was one particular event that triggered something for you, or if this was a gradual thing.
High school can be a tough time....there's no doubt about
that. However, I'm guessing with the activities that you've had that you must have friends who could be a good support to you. You mentioned that you had written notes to friends in your journal, and I wonder if you have talked to any of your friends about
Also, it seems like you are concerned that your mom is not taking your depression seriously (or have I misunderstood this?). You said that you are now getting help for your depression......does that mean counseling?
Sorry for all the questions....just trying to understand so that I can support you.
Please know that you've come to a really good place to post.....the people here are warm and compassionate, and we all understand what it's like to be depressed. ((hugs))