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New Member

Date Joined May 2009
Total Posts : 1
   Posted 5/18/2009 7:50 PM (GMT -6)   
i probably am not about to write anything new or unusual however i don't know what to do.
i was first depressed about a year and a half ago... last winter... and didn't do anything about it. i went to a couple therapy sessions. i cried a lot. i took out a lot of my frustrations and emotions on myself and my family. i became a bit reclusive, overanalyzed myself, thought about everything absurdly too much, and can no longer act on impulses... i'm always anticipating the way what i'm going to do will be perceived, i'm always worried, i'm always nervous, i'm always anxious about what people will think of me, i always feel out of place and slightly awkward. i feel "unattractive" in a lot of ways- not just physically- as if i have very little to offer to others in conversation, entertainment, etc. overall, i just feel alone and awkward and like there's no way i'm not going to feel like this. i feel destined to always feel bad. i feel like there's no solution and there's nothing that can be done. i feel helpless and pathetic and horribly pessimistic and i don't know what to do.

please offer up anythign and everything... i just want a sense of easiness in my life, i want to have fewer inhibitions, i want to be interesting and social, i want to be happy.

getting by
Forum Moderator

Date Joined Sep 2007
Total Posts : 42434
   Posted 5/18/2009 9:22 PM (GMT -6)   
Hi Standingstill,

We all can understand what you are feeling. We have all went through this at one time or another. You need to learn to love yourself. That is the first and most important thing that you have to do. After that, the rest falls into place. Remember that you are a good person. Kind and sensitive. That is so important in this world. You are beautiful. Just because you don't like things about yourself doesn't mean that somebody else doesn't. We all see things in different ways, or I should say we all find different things attractive.

Are you going to any type of counseling? I think it would be good for you to have that support and guidance. I think that you would like it too.

And once you learn to accept yourself for who you are, you wont worry about what other people are thinking. So try to love yourself, maybe get some self help books to read. Work on positive affirmations. You will get the hang of it and then you will be happy.

And remember that we are all here for you.

Hugs, Karen
  Moderator-Depression and fibromyalgia
fibromyalgia, Chronic fatigue, depression,allergies

Elite Member

Date Joined Mar 2009
Total Posts : 20186
   Posted 5/18/2009 9:34 PM (GMT -6)   
hey standingstill, your recovery has just started, by posting you are acknowledging that you are depressed, how it is affecting, and effecting you. your insights to what is happening shows that you indeed have an intellect, moreover i feel you would do well by seeking medical help via advising the doc of the affect and effect issues, about the slight reclusiveness, and the loss of interset in things and the very real despair you are feeling. keep posting, with co-operative help things will improve. healings, we care ok, jamie
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