Hard on us all

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Veteran Member

Date Joined Aug 2006
Total Posts : 9664
   Posted 5/26/2009 6:08 PM (GMT -6)   
My sister in law ex husband, committed suicide last week and well it's been hard on us all.
he's left behind two great kids both under ten years of age, and they'll are having a hard time with it..
We liked him and he was generally a good guy,
Sorry, I hope this isn't breaking forum rules, but I just wish he'd thought about his kids before he did
what he felt he had to do, just thinking of them and how he's left them..and when it's supposed
to be a happy time for us as well as our daughter is about to graduate HS and now we have to
deal with this too...it's so hard, WHY???
* Asthma, Allergies, Osteoarthritis, Spinal Stenosis, Degenative Disc, Fibromyalgia, Gerd,
Enlarged Pituitary Gland, Sjogren's and Ocular Migraines


Elite Member

Date Joined Apr 2007
Total Posts : 32602
   Posted 5/26/2009 6:23 PM (GMT -6)   
I am so sorry to hear of this person's death and I think anytime we learn of the death of someone that was part of our life it brings home thoughts of our own mortality.
It reminds us that we live in the real world where everything is not always sunny and bad things happen to good people.  Life is for the living and I hope you can put this saddness aside and make your daughter's graduation a time of celebration.  You all deserve to enjoy her moment.  IMHO that seems to be the best thing to do.
Bless you,


Kitt, Co-Moderator:
Depression,  & 
http://www.healingwell.com/donate *~*
Not a mental health professional of any kind
Peace does not dwell in outward things, but within the soul
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Regular Member

Date Joined May 2009
Total Posts : 86
   Posted 5/26/2009 6:27 PM (GMT -6)   
I'm sorry to hear of your loss. I hope that you can enjoy your daughters graduation, it is amazing time. I remember my graduation vividly from 2006, I miss those days.

getting by
Forum Moderator

Date Joined Sep 2007
Total Posts : 42612
   Posted 5/26/2009 6:37 PM (GMT -6)   
I so understand how you are feeling. I lost my nephew to suicide last September. It truly is a hard ordeal especially when you think about the children left behind. My nephew had a three year old daughter. She is beautiful. We just try to give her all the love that we can. Take things one step at a time. You will get through this and so will eveybody else all in their own time. There is no time limit on grief and there is no right or wrong way to deal with it.

I think that you should deal with the graduation as it comes, I think it will be a lot easier than you think, as right now everybody is in shock. You will get through this, I know that you will.

Keep posting and let us know how you are doing.

Hugs to you,

  Moderator-Depression and fibromyalgia
fibromyalgia, Chronic fatigue, depression,allergies

Veteran Member

Date Joined Mar 2009
Total Posts : 1190
   Posted 5/26/2009 7:08 PM (GMT -6)   
Hi Chartreux,
I'm terribly sorry to read about your sister-in-law's ex-husband.  Suicide is so difficult to cope with, especially when there are children in the situation......and all I can imagine is that he must have been in excruciating pain to be driven to this.  It's very sad.  I hope the children will be able to heal from this in time, as much as any of us can heal from such a painful loss.  sad
Please do go on to celebrate your daughter's graduation.  It's a very special time for her, and I know you will come to cherish the memories of this with her.  Perhaps spending time with her and helping her to plan for her future will give you some happier moments and positive things to look forward to.
Your family is in my prayers.



“If what I say resonates with you, it is merely because we are both branches on the same tree."  ~W.B. Yeats

Veteran Member

Date Joined Jul 2006
Total Posts : 1257
   Posted 5/26/2009 7:50 PM (GMT -6)   

Dear Chartreux, I am so sorry to learn of this terrible event that has happened in your family.  My heart goes out to those children losing their father in such an unbelievable way. I think what is hard for those left behind is understanding why this happens.  You need time to grieve and there is no set amount of time that it takes. You will grieve for as long as you have to.  If you could find a support group that might help all of you to get along better these next weeks and months.  As far as your daughter, do try to celebrate her graduation.  This is a special time for her and an occasion she will want to enjoy.  Please remember that all your HW friends are thinking of you.  You will be in my prayers. Try to take good care of you.

Gentle hugs,


Elite Member

Date Joined Mar 2009
Total Posts : 20279
   Posted 5/27/2009 6:06 AM (GMT -6)   
dear chartruex, sincere apologies for your loss. it is darn hard, agree with the loving info from auroa60. my prayers to you will be of healing. jamie

Veteran Member

Date Joined Apr 2004
Total Posts : 6056
   Posted 5/27/2009 6:38 AM (GMT -6)   
Sending prayers for all concerned. My deepest sympathy.
~ Jeannie, Forum Moderator/Diabetes & Fibromyalgia
I know God will not give me anything I can't handle. I just wish that He didn't trust me so much. ~Mother Teresa

"People are like stained glass windows: They sparkle and shine when the sun's out, but when the darkness sets in, their true beauty is revealed only if there is light within."- Elizabeth Kubler-Ross

Veteran Member

Date Joined Aug 2006
Total Posts : 9664
   Posted 5/27/2009 7:32 PM (GMT -6)   
Wanted to say thank you for all the responses, it sure has help..
Each and all of you have lots of soft hugz from me...
I'm grateful and glad to have y'all as friends.
I'll be gone for awhile as I've gotta plan a trip up North for the Graduation party (Michigan) and then the wake (Iowa), I do plan to come back
but it'll be in July, So stay well my friends and you'll be in my thoughts and If you don't mind my
Prayers as well...
Thank You..
* Asthma, Allergies, Osteoarthritis, Spinal Stenosis, Degenative Disc, Fibromyalgia, Gerd,
Enlarged Pituitary Gland, Sjogren's and Ocular Migraines


Elite Member

Date Joined Mar 2009
Total Posts : 20279
   Posted 5/28/2009 12:21 AM (GMT -6)   
see ya when ya get back, all the best, have a great grad. jamie, a happy face 4 u. smilewinkgrin jamie
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