Good Morning and a warm welcome...........this is Kitt. I have depression. I also have anxiety. I did not have a great Step Mom growing up so I understand some of how you feel.
I am glad you went out yesterday and hung out with your friends. It is good that you are not isolating yourself from your friends, they can help you stay grounded in who you are. You are a special, unique person and now you are a member of this wonderful family at HealingWell.
It sounds like you've been having a really tough time recently and you've taken a brave step in coming here and talking with us.
I am going to touch just a bit on self injury.
There are several different flat-out-crisis-in-the-moment strategies to use when you get the urge to self injure.
Do anything that isn't self injuring and produces intense sensation: squeezing ice, taking a cold bath or hot or cold shower, biting into something strongly flavored (hot peppers, ginger root, unpeeled lemon/lime/grapefruit), rubbing Ben-Gay or Icy-Hot or using Vick Vap-O-Rub under your nose are a few.
I have a friend that throws paper plates until she is exhausted and the impulse has passed. No broken plates to pick up
These strategies work because the intense emotions that provoke self injury are transient; they come and go like waves, and if you can stay upright through one, you get some breathing room before the next one. The more waves you tolerate without falling over, the stronger you become.
You have met a lot of great members here and I am glad you have received such wonderful advice. Keep on talking to us as we are here to support you and do use the crisis hot line numbers if you need to. Keep reaching out for help and you will find it.
Here are a couple of numbers that may work for your location:
Hotline/Crisis: 340-776-7867 or 809-776-7867
Gentle Hugs to you,
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"When you find peace within yourself, you become the kind of person who can live at peace with others."
Not a mental health professional of any kind
Clickable Link: Anxiety-Panic Resources