Good Morning Erik,
I just got to your post just now and I am glad to see you are feeling better today. You never have to apologize to anyone here. We are your peers and your friends.
What great responses you have received. I can only talk from my heart as I have felt like you over and over in my life and as I get older I find my fears more bothersome.
I have felt that hopelessness you speak of way to often and I have never quite accepted that I am worthy of happiness. I know I set my expectations to high but now I feel like I am running out of time and will I ever truly feel happy again or will it always be a battle?
As you know I fight to stay in the moment and not worry about yesterday as that is over and behind me, tomorrow has not yet arrived so I need not worry about tommorow.
I know you to be a fighter and yet you have these really lows and that is OK my friend. It is part of the disorder of depression. Coming here and talking about your feelings, sharing and letting us support you is an excellent way to let out all of your feelings and doubts.
When your fears have the best of you, it is easy to feel that things will not get any better. This is not true. Just a gentle reminder, i
“Man can live about forty days without food, about three days without water, about eight minutes without air, but only for one second without hope”
Erik, I wish you hope!