I haven't checked in here for quite some time, mainly due to some life changes and some technology problems. about nine months ago, my world of solitary disability virtually changed overnight. I met a nice guy and he quickly moved in with me last September. He had a wacky work schedule, seven days on (twelve hour shifts), seven days off. It was great, like spending a week's vacation together every couple of weeks. Well, my man JB, lost his job of seven years back in April. He's getting unemployment and pounding the pavement every week, but we are together almost ALL THE TIME!!! Twenty-four hours a day, seven days a week....week in, week out. There is such a thing as too much closeness. He has no hobbies and no friends that he goes off and does things with, and rarely can I go run any errands that he doesn't want to go with me.
Worst of all, he's a certified "redneck" and is used to acting stupid to amuse his less than intelligent buddies. He's very smart himself, but he's so used to covering it up, all I've been getting is "yuck-yuck" humor since he lost his job. I rarely get to carry on an intelligent conversation anymore. He's depressed, sleeps a lot, has gained a lot of weight which has killed our sex life (although he talks about it all day long...which makes me want to do it even less). JB only drinks occasionally, but when he does, he really does it to excess. He stumbles into everything, heaven forbid if I don't get him home fast enough, and then he gets verbally mean...just yelling at me. It's not hurtful per se, just obnoxious, and I have to sit through it until he passes out. I belong to a social/charitable organization that likes to casually party from time to time and JB has basically made himself unwelcome among my friends if he is drinking.
I feel like I'm between a rock and a hard place. He is a tremendous help to me around the house, and can do all sorts of things that my disabilities limit me from doing on a daily basis, if I can him up and moving. I just don't know what to do. JB is 52 and I'm 44 in case that makes any difference. Anybody got some advise for me? I'm really drowning like this. HELP!!!
- On Disability for: Chronic Migraines, serious Back and Knee problems (will need surgery eventually), moderate Depression, Anxiety/Panic disorder, TMJ, stomach problems
- Divorced, 44, spawn-free
- Surgeries: Gastric Bypass, Gallbladder Removed (followed by a week in the hospital for a Blood Clot), Impacted Kidney Stone Removed, Broken Ankle, Major Dental work(ten molars pulled, multiple cavities, root canals) Tubal Ligation/D&C/Uterine Ablation
- Current Meds: Prozac, Klonopin, Atenelol, Lortab, Trazadone, Buspar, Nexium, Tramadol, Hydroxizine, Vitamin D, Axert, Zonegran, Seroquel
- PROHIBITED FROM ALL NSAIDS
- Current Problem: Moderate Depression, Chronic back pain, Mysterious Internal GI Bleeding, possible ulcer in location of Gastric Bypass, frequent UTI's
"The weather is here, I wish you were beautiful."
- Jimmy Buffett