I am so sorry this has happened to you. The reason why we have suggested therapy is while it cannot undo what has been done to you, but it can help you define boundaries, and help with your self esteem (i.e. when you say you shame yourself and hate yourself that really worries me). Because that means you still have some healing to do. I do not want you to keep drinking the poison of your abuse by saying negative things about
yourself (feeling shame and hate towards yourself if not healthy and we really want to encourage you to find a way to heal the hurt that allows you to feel that, therapy is one way to do that). I might suggest that you actually do therapy with an child abuse specialist, and that you might just need to go every week for the rest of your life to keep those negative thoughts at bay. You might need even more intense therapy.
I assume that your parents inflicted this abuse upon you, and so I strongly encourage you to maintain no contact.
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I will find a way or make one. –Phillip Sidney 1554-1586
All that I am and all that I shall ever be, I owe to my Angel Mother.
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