I'm taking what im thinking is possibly my first step to a long road to recovery....
A bit of a background on myself, is Im a 31 year old Cdn male, I am one of 7 siblings, 2 of which have already been diagnosed and treated for depression. I seemed to think that somehow I had escaped it, but I think it's caught up with me and only now am I starting to accept it. I'm often a very happy, confident person, but in the last few years ive had numerous "episodes" where I've completely lost self-control and acted out in ways I would never think possible (Crashing my car into a snow bank, punching holes in the wall, giving myself a concussion) thus hurting loved ones and myself, I usually wake up the next day thinking it was a one-time thing and it'll never happen again. But these episodes have been alot more frequent in the last few months so I'm starting to think there may be more to this.
I've been doing alot of online reasearch in the last 48 hours about this condition. I can relate to many other people who have posted, but not to all. I don't drink to cover up the pain, i've injured myself intentionally, but never contemplated suicide (am I far off though?)
I've considered calling the local crisis center for help, but am shy and perfer to hide behind a monitor for now. Based on my username, im currently in another country (Which I dont think is impacting my condition, but I could be wrong), I would consider speaking to my family doctor, but I won't be home for another few months. Im sure the no-brainer here would be to talk to my siblings, but the reality is im quite embarassed about and don't think im ready to take that step just yet.
Was just looking for some advice on how to "get started". Thanks :)
Post Edited By Moderator (stkitt) : 9/20/2009 7:15:15 AM (GMT-6)