hi im new and would really appreciate advice or a friendly hear

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New Member

Date Joined Oct 2009
Total Posts : 1
   Posted 10/6/2009 7:16 PM (GMT -6)   
Hi im new and on here as it 1.15 in the morning and i cant sleep.  i was in an abusive marriage and did things to please my partner sexually that i am totally now ashamed of. I was only young when i met him but after a decade of controlling and grooming sexually to do more and more im disgusted and dont know what to do. i have had councelling but it not done what i had hoped. i just feel so often i need to get things off my chest and i dont want to burden family and friends.  i have been diagnosed with anxiety and ptsd and i just feel so low. i cant find any forums that speak specifically about domestic voilence or anything related and wondered if anyone can help.

getting by
Forum Moderator

Date Joined Sep 2007
Total Posts : 42609
   Posted 10/6/2009 9:41 PM (GMT -6)   
Hi Crynomore,

Welcome to healingwell and the depression forum. We are here to listen, but I have to say we do have members as young as 13. If it shouldn't be viewed by them, it can't be put on the forum. But we want to help you as much as we can.

I am sorry for your past circumstances. That is a lot to deal with and I am sure that it is going to take some time to get over. And dealing with ptsd isn't easy either, but remember that your mind will protect you through this. It will deal with the situation when it is able to.

I highly recommend you to try counseling again. You just migth not have gotten the right counselor for you. There are many out there and you will find the one that clicks with you. Be patient.

I hope that you start feeling better soon. Remember one day at a time.

Best wishes,

Hugs Karen
  Moderator-Depression and fibromyalgia
fibromyalgia, Chronic fatigue, depression,allergies

Elite Member

Date Joined Mar 2009
Total Posts : 20279
   Posted 10/6/2009 11:02 PM (GMT -6)   
i feel that a specific counsellor in regards to your circumstances will help you a lot. i did the this. yeah, hard to finfd the right one, thus talk with your doc for a referal to an appropriate service. you have done well in posting, i admire your courage. keep being courages and find the right person for you. keep safe and keep being brave. with healing compassion. jamie
dx, mdd severe borderline personality disorder.

Precious Gem
Veteran Member

Date Joined Oct 2008
Total Posts : 1139
   Posted 10/8/2009 12:11 PM (GMT -6)   

You were young and I assume in love, so you did things that now do not suit who you are.  You know what?  That is OK.  Live your life now based on what feels right to you.  Easier said than done but letting the past go is the best thing you can ever do for yourself.  Learn a lesson and move on.  Everyone makes mistakes and has done things they later regretted. 

Jamiee is right about the counseling.  Look for someone in a very specific field.  I have PTSD as well, long story, but you will get over it one way or another.  Don't be too hard on yourself and go forward, lessons learned.


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