My husband came home from Iraq 4 weeks ago this Thurs. (11/12). I could see it in his face when he was walking up from the ramp from the plane that something was wrong. And then seeing that, the irritation I thought I was hearing on the phone with him while he was gone started to worry me. I can pin point in e-mails and on one particular phone conversation when he changed. I just assumed it was because he was fed up and ready to come home. Serving his time, so to speak. This was is 3rd deployment in the last two years each lasting 4 months, all in Iraq. He swears that nothing happened (dangerous) this deployment. I know for a fact his first deployment consisted of his base getting bombed 3 or 4 times the first one happening within a couple weeks of him being there landing about
60ft from him.
His mood and behavior are like this. He came home and gave me a hug and a quick peck. And that's the last time he has touched me. Last night he actually made our son scoot over on the couch to avoid sitting next to me. Which hurt so badly I ended up in our closet crying for over an hour. I have cried myself to sleep every day since he's been home. He won't talk, unless it's necessary, 'get me this from the grocerey store', etc... He won't say I love you, nothing. He tries with the kids, tells them he loves them, hugs them goodbye, plays with them, etc... I can see his hearts not totally in it. But, he did tell me he does feel something towards them, it's just not what it should be. 4 days after being home we sat down and talked and he said he has no emotion towards anything. He knows he loves me but doesn't feel anything towards me. And it's apparent in how I'm treated. He does things if I ask, and a few things even if I don't (dishes, laundry etc..). But, there is no joy there. A guy at work said he was 'beat down'. I couldn't choose better words myself. Another guy at work told him he was different. I'm not the only one who's noticed, I'm just getting the brunt of all of it.
Within 1 week of him being home, I had made a Dr.s appt and he is now on Pristiq. My biggest obstical right now is that I am dealing with this all while 28 weeks pregnant with our 3rd baby. I am typically an emotional person anyway, but being pregnant on top of it, I am really losing it. I feel everything is directed at me. He's been sleeping on the couch since he's been home with no indication whatsoever that he wants to come to bed. This is so hard. Everything I've been reading says that I may not see any sign of a mood change until he hits the 6th-8th week of being on this medication. That puts me 4 weeks from my due date and then our lives change big with our 3rd baby. And that's if the meds even work. He's been gone so much, I miss him. He's home, but he's not. I don't know what to do. Is there another woman out there dealing with the same thing that can give me some advice? Is there anyone out there on Pristiq that can share? Please, anything is better than nothing.