I take medications and they don't make me want to commit suicide. Not all people go through that. But if you don't want to go the medication route, there are many other things that you can do to feel better. You can go with herbals, exercise, therapy or meditation. Get a book on one of the subjects and see what you can learn. You need to be proactive right now. You are looking out for a little one.
It seems as though you needed to take in to account that you wouldn't be financially set without your boyfriend's income. But the bridge has already been crossed, so you have to decide what to do now. With counseling, you would have an idea of what route to take. I think that is something that you should think about
There are many good depression books that would help you. So reading would be another way to go. There are a couple of on line sites that you might be interested in too.
Check these places out and see if that helps you some.
I hope that you are feeling better soon. Your son will still be happy and feel safe with you. You are a wonderful person worthy of happiness.
Moderator-Depression and fibromyalgia
fibromyalgia, Chronic fatigue, depression,allergies