I was chatting to my friend marie last night about how i was feeling and she suggested tht I phone the doc 1st thing as i cant go on like this til my appointment on friday - so thts wat i did.
I phoned up stating tht it was an emergency and wanted to see my doc today and the next available appointment was friday despite me stating tht this was an emergency.
It seems like whenever I try and open up and ask for professional help no one wants to know or if they do they dont take me seriously.
I was tht desperate I even phoned the surgery back up this afternoon to see if there was any change but they were still saying friday and i already have one for then.
I am worried coz the urge to sh is very strong and with my mood swings i could do something on impulse. I have to wonder what the point is struggling on trying to get professional help when my voice goes unheard.
I dont know if i can make it til friday. I dont know if i want to either - it's the first anniversary of steven's death.
"I've woken now to find myself, In the shadows of all I have created, I'm longing to be lost in you, Wont you take me away from me." (evanescence "away from me")
"It rips your heart out and leaves you bleeding with a smile on your face." (HIM "and love said no")
"Happy hunting you double faced carnivore" (Nightwish "Romanticide"