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Regular Member

Date Joined Jun 2003
Total Posts : 73
   Posted 11/15/2004 2:40 PM (GMT -6)   
I was chatting to my friend marie last night about how i was feeling and she suggested tht I phone the doc 1st thing as i cant go on like this til my appointment on friday - so thts wat i did.
I phoned up stating tht it was an emergency and wanted to see my doc today and the next available appointment was friday despite me stating tht this was an emergency.
It seems like whenever I try and open up and ask for professional help no one wants to know or if they do they dont take me seriously.
I was tht desperate I even phoned the surgery back up this afternoon to see if there was any change but they were still saying friday and i already have one for then.
I am worried coz the urge to sh is very strong and with my mood swings i could do something on impulse.  I have to wonder what the point is struggling on trying to get professional help when my voice goes unheard.
I dont know if i can make it til friday.  I dont know if i want to either - it's the first anniversary of steven's death.
"I've woken now to find myself, In the shadows of all I have created, I'm longing to be lost in you, Wont you take me away from me." (evanescence "away from me")

"It rips your heart out and leaves you bleeding with a smile on your face." (HIM "and love said no")

"Happy hunting you double faced carnivore" (Nightwish "Romanticide"

New Member

Date Joined Nov 2004
Total Posts : 1
   Posted 11/15/2004 10:45 PM (GMT -6)   
Hi this is my first post. I have tons of problems myself but I won't get into that just here and now. I've experienced the same thing, back during my depression. I would be so upset and I completely lost it many times when I needed help or just needed to talk to someone, and I would pleed with my parents to get me to the doctor right that second, numerous times. And that never happened ofcourse, I had to sit and wait for "the appointment." And then there were the times that I had my parents bring me directly to the emergency room, which happened like 3 times. One of those times I talked to a nice lady and decided not to check in, 2 of those times I did check in. That's not counting the other time I was hospitalized outside those times. Anyways, what I'm trying to say is I feel for you, you're not the only one, it can happen more than once, and just do your best to make it through until friday. just keep yourself busy, I know nothing interests me when im depressed, but as long as you do something to keep yourself busy it will be easier. I find that when I'm not doing anything I'm more depressed and I dwell on my bad feelings. I hoped something I've said may help you, I feel like I'm rambling a bit. This is my first post and I think this place may help me too, and if I recall I read a post about being paranoid I think you posted about it too, and that's one of my main problems, I have extreme paranoia and delusions, I think we could relate. Good luck, and hope to talk to you again.

Veteran Member

Date Joined Apr 2004
Total Posts : 6056
   Posted 11/16/2004 12:47 PM (GMT -6)   
What J. says is true! If you can stay somewhat busy until Friday... I have some suggestions of what I do when I'm down... maybe it will work for you. I scrub out the bathtub and clean the bathroom. I KNOW.. IT SOUNDS DUMB! But once I wet down the tub, sprinkle in the cleanser, turn around and swish out the toilet, then....... I get a good scrub brush and really scrubb the heck out of the bathtub. It always needs it so it's always waiting for me to do... I get a toothbrush and do the little crack around the edge... I use rubbing alcohol on a papertowel for the chrome handles... Then I ge the mildew remover and do the tiles on the wall that are all yucky from soap scum and mildew... I usually have my radio on up LOUD while I'm cleaning and really get into it.

When I'm finished it's amazing! I'm still feelin bad but the whole bathroom is sparkling and somehow that shiny, clean makes me feel a bit better. Sometimes just getting a wet paper towel and wiping down the dust on the dash of my truck makes me feel better... Maybe it's just me... maybe scrubbing the tub wouldn't help you at all. .. But it's worth a try...

Hang in there. We will be thinking of you.
~ Jeannie

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