I've been depressed for many years due to various reasons. Currently I am not seeing a doctor due to insurance problems. There are not many doctor's who take Medicaid. Any way
I have been feeling more and more depressed as each day goes by. I keep reminding myself that I am still here because my girls need me!!!! My marriage is ending (my choice), I am starting a new job, I haven't worked in 4 years and I am scarred that I am going to fail, like I do at everything (says my soon to be ex) I have alot of medical problems but not enough to be on disability just enough in my head. Seeing a new doctor is going to be impossible with working fulltime. The waiting list to see a new doctor is about 5-6 months.....I guess I'll just keep trying. My 9 year old daughter made a remark to me tonight that really hurt she said
mommy when I'm going to be a mommy I'm not going to be sick all the time I'm going to be a fun mommy!!!!!!! I know she is only 9 but it still hurts!!!!!
I start my new job next week, I hope I can do this.........I just want to take some sleeping pills and go to sleeep for a long time and wake up when everything is good............
I know I should not talk like that but that's the mood........
HOPE, FAITH AND LOVE
Total Coletomy Feb. 07
Total Hysterectomy Oct 08
Barrett's Esophagus Nov 09
Currently taking: Synthroid, Cymbalta 60mg, Lyrica, Kapidex, Carafate suspension & Ambien CR