Writing does help you think more rationally. And gets the little things out of your mind. You are right, don't make any decisions when you are not thinking rational. Are you going to any counseling? I think it would really help to have some support right now.
Try not to dwell on things, occupy your mind with a project of some sort. Try to live in the moment (the now) and not let your mind wander. This works for me. There is so much more to life than dwelling on things. That only confuses us and causes us to do things we wouldn't normally do. I am glad that you are seeing this.
Keep posting, as we are all here for you.
Moderator-Depression and fibromyalgia
fibromyalgia, Chronic fatigue, depression,allergies