Immediate help, please!

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New Member

Date Joined Feb 2010
Total Posts : 1
   Posted 2/28/2010 11:01 PM (GMT -6)   
My boyfriend is at work right now. He texted and called me and said that today was the day he would . He would finish work, come home to say goodbye to me, then he would do it. I don't believe he's joking. I have actually had to stop him from  before with my own hands. I am absolutely terrified because he has had thoughts of suicide since he was 12 years old and now he's 19. He says very often that I was the only reason he wasn't dead already, but that I'm just not enough to stop him anymore.  Just so that you all understand, he is a VERY private person. He doesn't leave the house. He doesn't have any friends except me, he takes all online courses for school, and he hates his family and my family. He does not respond well to others. He is a very unique individual. He didn't speak to anyone for years as a child. What I'm trying to get across is that if I involve anyone else and he knows about it, it will only provoke him more and make him act faster. I am terrified and don't know what to do. I've tried everything. I've tried the whole "what about the people who care about you, what about me? you don't want to hurt us do you?" (paraphrased) but that doesn't fase him. He just figures that he won't feal guilt if he's dead so who cares who he hurts. Somebody please help me and soon.

Post Edited By Moderator (getting by) : 3/1/2010 5:57:40 AM (GMT-7)

Veteran Member

Date Joined Dec 2005
Total Posts : 1768
   Posted 2/28/2010 11:07 PM (GMT -6)   
I'd google suicide hotlines and ask them what they would do or say. I personally haven't dealt with that, so I wouldn't know what to do or say. Also, could you possibly take him to a hospital? They could keep him for a 72 hour hold and refer him for help...I don't know how much you can influence him, or if you could get him to do that...but maybe it's a possibility.

I'm so sorry you're dealing with it on your own. It must be hard to deal with.

32 yr old female-dx with Crohn's in '97 after emergency resection and appendectomy, 2nd resection '05, Bilateral pulmonary emboli 10/09
Currently on Humira, Omeprazole, Effexor, Seroquel, Calcium, Vit D, Coumadin

New Member

Date Joined Sep 2009
Total Posts : 14
   Posted 2/28/2010 11:31 PM (GMT -6)   
I think you want to get him to call the COAST hotline and have them come to meet with him or take him if you can to a hospital-at  least they will keep him under watch. Not to over medicate him necesarily. Stay strong and see if you can reason with him again. I hope things subside and improve

Elite Member

Date Joined Mar 2009
Total Posts : 20279
   Posted 3/1/2010 5:04 AM (GMT -6)   
he needs immediate psychiatric care. you can call the hospital and advise them of his very urgent situation. with compassion,
jamie. sorry but i feel he needs to be admitted.

getting by
Forum Moderator

Date Joined Sep 2007
Total Posts : 42610
   Posted 3/1/2010 8:07 AM (GMT -6)   
Hi Lindsay,
Here is some info that might help you.  But I am sure that they are going to tell you the same thing the members have said.  Get him to a hospital.
National Suicide Hotline
1-800-SUICIDE (1-800-784-2433)
This is a combined network of the Amerian Association of Suicidology, the National Hopeline Network, CONTACT USA, and many other organizations. Call are automatically routed to the nearest crisis center to the phone from which the call for help is placed.

Helpful Web Sites:
Suicide Hotlines (listed by state) (includes Suicide Crisis Center and Depression and Suicide)
Unfortuanately it is hard to stop somebody when they have this in their minds.  I had an old boyfriend who tried several times and finally succeeded.  I feel that if they have tried before, generally they eventually do this.  You might not want to be around when he does.  We aren't suppose to talk about this on the forum, so excuse me for being vague.  But I want to warn you what you might be in for in the future.  You can't stop him if his mind is set on this.  He will find a way.  I am sorry to say this, but I dont' want to sugar coat it for you.  I have been through it. 
If you can get him to go in for help, that would be a huge relief for you.  I honestly think he is being very selfish in the mannor that he is doing this.  Telling you about it, and saying his last goodbyes.  But that is besides the point.  Take care of you.  Protect your self and your feelings.  You are a good caring person and don't deserve to go through this.  I know that you care about him, but he seems to depend on that.  And I know that this is hurting you.
Tread lightly my dear.
Remember that you are special and that we care.
Hugs, Karen<!-- Edit -->
  Moderator-Depression and fibromyalgia
fibromyalgia, Chronic fatigue, depression,allergies

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