Dearest Juliaa , I am so sorry you are feeling so much pain , I know how difficult it can be .Please remember you are loved and cared about and have worth , because you do .Try not to focus on the actions of others so much , people act strangley sometimes in stessful situations like losing a loved one .Just know you gave love in an honorable way and that you cared , we can't ever tell what others will do . Have you tried speaking to a therapist Juliaa ? They can guide you thru stessful times and have done wonders for me I can tell you .Please try , don't isolate yourself , you sound like a loving person ,maybe you can volounteer helping somewhere ,it works wonders and is very fullfilling .And please remember you have friends here anytime .
HIV+ also Hep c , need hip replacement surgery on hold because of unknown but cellulitus-like ailment .most pain from hip condition and cellulitus-like ailment .hands numb may have carpal tunnel syndrome now . Great frustration because doctors unable to diagnos ailment .Medecines - Oxycontin , percocet , Celelbrex ,Avalox , lasix .