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New Member

Date Joined Mar 2010
Total Posts : 1
   Posted 3/20/2010 2:23 AM (GMT -6)   
ok let me start out by saying this is my first attempt in doing this.
So i know that others see me as cute or attractive but it seems that i cant find the confidence i used to have. The thing is i fell in love hard for someone i never said it to. I have come to terms with it and have somewhat moved on, but i still cant find the confidence i still wonder from time to time what if until recently. Now i have just the urge to stay away from her even when i do see her i just dont care which i feel is good could be wrong. The fact is i just dont have confidence in myself. I feel as though I'm never good enough for anyone no matter what i do what i have or how i look i still feel like im not good enough. I feel like im looking for something that isn't real. I just want true happiness i want to be happy. I hardly ever talk about how i feel or if im upset it's just not me so im trying this out. But i feel sad when im alone i feel as though no one wants to be around me when im by myself especially if i had something planed rather it had been for a month or an hour i feel as though it didnt work out because of me. I feel as though no matter how hard i try ill never be worthy of being with any woman. I dont know how to restore the confidence i ounce had i need so help with tips or pointers with how to deal with this

Elite Member

Date Joined Mar 2009
Total Posts : 20279
   Posted 3/20/2010 5:25 AM (GMT -6)   
hi whjan25. jamie, male, 37.
i feel that some counselling would benefit you. we as individuals are our worst critic and sometimes our worst enemies. i feel if you can define the situation and learn some tools to not put yourself down i feel things will improve greatly. relationships sadly do come and go, usely love finds you, as i have found out, and not you finding it. also remember to embrace you as you. we are all unique individuals with quirks, gifts, talents that are unique to only us. life is a journey, relationships are apart of this. i wish you well. remember one day at a time. and the past is the past, this is a hard thing to embrace, especially when much emotion is apart of it. you have been brave in posting, keep being brave and seek some professional assistance. with compassion, jamie ps, welcome to the forum.
sometimes i forget to welcome new members!! just tired 99% of the time!!

Regular Member

Date Joined Mar 2010
Total Posts : 42
   Posted 3/20/2010 8:48 AM (GMT -6)   

Hi whjan25,  I agree with jamiee, sometimes we are our own worse enemy, we run ourselves down so much more then anyone else does. I thing if you could find some counselling this would really help you, they will talk with you and work this out with you, at your speed. They won't push you into doing anything you don't feel happy in doing.

I used to feel the same way as you, and if truth be known, sometimes now I get little weak times where I start feeling that way again, but I have been taught the way of positive thinking. The thoughts you are having are negitive thoughts, due to negitive thinking. If you can get to talk to a perfessional (i.e counselling) they should be able to help you train your mind to positive thinking, which is better for you. This isn't easy, I won't say it is, but once we learn to do this life seems so much easier.

Good luck with this. I know it took great courage to post on here, thats the first step to feeling better.

Best wishes

Lee x

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