Boyfriend Issues

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New Member

Date Joined Apr 2010
Total Posts : 1
   Posted 4/12/2010 7:55 PM (GMT -6)   
Hey everyone, I have been battling depression for some time now. I just sit and cry for no reason sometimes. I have had this boyfriend now for about three months. We are both in college, I am a freshman and he is a senior. He has lots of work he has to get done for senior year and I have a bit more free time. We we first started dating he would ask to see me a lot and would keep in touch with me throughout the day. Now he barely says anything to me, he'll im me on facebook instead of texting me most of the time, and he hardly asks me to do anything anymore, I always have to ask him. This makes me wonder if it's just the work that is overwhelming him right now or if he just isn't as interested in me anymore. I have tried talking to him about it and he says it's only the work, but still.. he could just put in a little more effort, am I right?

getting by
Forum Moderator

Date Joined Sep 2007
Total Posts : 42610
   Posted 4/12/2010 9:48 PM (GMT -6)   
Hi Moosiex,

Welcome to healingwell. You have come to a good place for support for depression.

You know when you are depressed, you feel more needy and you often lose self esteem. So I think that your boyfriend probably has a lot on his mind and is busy at work. When you are working you don't have time to text. In some places you could even lose your job. So I wouldn't be worrying about him not being as interested as he was. He is probably just busy. And he told you it was work anyway.

So I would relax about it and not worry. If he was losing interest, you would know it. And if he does, it wouldn't be the end of the world now would it? You would move on. And so would he. But if I were you, I would just focus on the positive and school. That is what is important right now. And he will respect you more for it.

Hugs, Karen
  Moderator-Depression and fibromyalgia
fibromyalgia, Chronic fatigue, depression,allergies

Elite Member

Date Joined Mar 2009
Total Posts : 20279
   Posted 4/15/2010 4:35 AM (GMT -6)   
he could, albeit he may if he was not so busy.......this i am guessing? karen makes good sense. when he is not so busy check out to see if he steps up a little. if not........well. all the best to you. do well in school okay!! i went back as a mature age student...and still finishing stuff as an old fart!!! 37yrs of age, not old perse, well not in my head and heart anyway!! keep focused. remember to give your brain a break every so often too. i recommend walking and smelling the roses. look after you too. sending postive vibes your way. jamie.

Regular Member

Date Joined Nov 2005
Total Posts : 222
   Posted 4/19/2010 11:38 AM (GMT -6)   
Number one issue is: Communication! Let him know just as you let us know how you feel. He may have good reason and then he may alter things or he may at least explain where he is at.

Just do not believe "he should know better or act in such or such a way " as this is unfair.

If it turns out he denies these behavoirs then a choice must be made. But at least all will be upfront

God bless

This too shall pass

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