hey, i'm tabitha, i'm only 13. i know if you hear that you'll probably think i'm just some stupid little kid who doesn't know what she's talking about
, but i really feel like i've been through way to much already. here's my story guys..
well last july i started talking to this guy. i never even met him until december, keep that in mind. but anyway, we started talking through myspace. he's a grade ahead of me. he went to the same school district, but a different middle school. well me and this guy really got to know each other, and i really liked him. but through august we just stopped talking. but when school started, in early-mid september, we started talking again. alot. i really started liking him, but like i said i never met him. but i trusted him with EVERYTHING. i told him every problem i had, and he told me everything. we got REALLY close from sep.-nov. and from my point of view, i thought i was in love with him. we were so close. but we had never even met. when ever we fought, i would take it so hard. he really became a huge part of my life. he was all i thought about
. i didn't want anyone but him. he made my life perfect. and i thought he felt the exact same. but one december day, i was at the mall with my friend, and i ran into him there. it was the best day of my life. i couldn't believe it. and from that exact moment i saw, i knew i loved him. i have never felt like this, ever before. i would do anything in the entire world for him. but about
a week after i met him, he told me he was moving to a different part of the state. i thought he was joking. i could not believe it. i was shocked. i took that so hard. he told me that i would have to move on, and that he knew he would meet another girl, and that i would find another guy. and that i would just have to get over him. he also told me he wanted me to be his bestfriend. i mean, thats not a bad thing, i just knew i would NEVER be able to get over him. and ever since that day he moved, i haven't been over him. then, in early january, he sent me pictures (which i didn't even ask for) and my dad found out. his mom blocked my number from his phone. i am no longer allowed to talk to him. but we still do on myspace and facebook. but thats it. ever since then, everything has been so much different. and to this day, i can still tell you, i do love him. i feel like i've been depressed since december, since he moved, and since the picture thing. he's dated other girls, i honestly think he doesn't care about
me anymore. he told me he's over me. i just can't seem to move on. he's always had a place in my heart. i would do anything in the world to have him again. he was my bestfriend, and i swear i love him..i just can't take this anymore. i've tried to get over him. i've tried dating other guys, i've tried writing, talking to my friends, but nothing seems to work. i don't think i can be happy if i don't have him in my life. i haven't been truly happy since all of this happened. something has just been missing, an empty feeling in my stomach all the time. half of the time when i try to talk to him, or when i say 'i really do love you' he says shutup. he doesn't believe me..i don't understand why i have to be put through all of this. i've asked god so many times, i really have thought about
if anyone would care if i was dead. i don't think anyone would care. i just want all of this to be over. he's changed my life so much and he doesn't understand how much i love him. i always have loved him. he doesn't understand that i'm not over him. he doesn't understand that i've so much, because i miss him so much. i'm lost without him here, in my life. i don't know what to do anymore. nothing ever seems to work. i love him, i really truly do. so much. can someone help please
Post Edited By Moderator (getting by) : 5/24/2010 3:56:03 PM (GMT-6)