Ok everyone, big news. I asked her a few days ago about what her thoughts were concerning the marriage. She told me the same thing she had been for a month. Obviously i am not important enough to her for her to try by now. I think a month is long enough to decide if you love a person or not. Maybe im wrong. So i told her that enough is enough, if shes not coming back its time to move out. That was thursday. Friday morning i told her that i had closed the bank account, took the dogs to my parents, and grabbed some stuff i didnt want her to have. She asked why i was doing this, and i told her that if she was ever going to be there for me, she would be there now. Ive been reviewing emails, journals, texts and a couple blog posts i made last year. Its obvious to me that she isnt the type of person i need. I told her that i still wanted to work things out, but i was not going to continue living my life on hold while shes off living like a single 17 year old. I reminded her that she was 26, a mother and wife, still without a job, and not living at home. I told her that the way she is living and spending money will never be okay with me. I gave her what i thought was a reasonable list of needs i have that she will have to live by for me to consider taking her back. things such as having sex at least once in awhile, giving me support even when she doesnt want to, tell me she loves me, apologize to my mother for the way she has treated her. There were 8 things, and none of them are out of line from my point of view, these are things i NEED, i cant change them, i NEED these things to be happy with her. I told her that i didnt trust her, i told her that i was beginning to get the feeling she was having an affair. Another demand of mine was that she was not going to be out past 1am anymore. Multiple times per week in the past months she has come home well after 2am, once she came home at 545 am and had the audacity to actually be mad at me for wondering what she was doing. The more i think about things, the more i realize that SHE just might need to change more than i do. Going over all the texts and stuff, theyre full of me offering to do things for her, to make her life easier, to make HER happy. Not once did i notice anywhere where she offered to do anything for me, IN 4 MONTHS WORTH OF TEXT, AND EMAIL. That is absolutely absurd to me. I AM depressed, but i think i may have found a major cause of it. Ive got stuff to work on, and will continue to work on them, but ive realized that this relationship takes two, and the woman in my life WILL be there for me, and no matter what i do, as long as she loves me, she'll be there for me, and NOT ABANDON ME. I gave her the weekend to get her stuff out and told her that if it wasnt out by the time I get home sunday night ( im out of town playing golf with my dad ) it goes to storage. Im pretty sure shes waiting for me to call her and back down, but that isnt happening. I really knew that she was a problem when i told my family i told her to get her stuff out, they all came straight to me and were so proud of me. They had kept their mouths shut with how they felt about what she has done, and i really appreciate that. Going through all this, i found myself making excuses for her to my family to protect her image, but they saw through all of it. I AM proud of myself right now. I do hate that my step daughter, she made it very clear that i wasnt her dad, has to go through all of this. But you know what, none of it was my decision. I did some things to cause a few problems with our relationship, but nothing like what she has done. Ive told her throughout all this that i loved her, and made efforts to improve the state of things. She has not, and i will not live that way. I deserve better than her. She has been pretty heartless through all of this. She missed my sisters bridal shower, a wedding that she was in until yesterday when i told my sister what happened. I didnt say a word to her about it, because her play is SOOOO important. She told me she made a commitment to the play and couldnt let everyone in it down. Well, i told her that she made a commitment to me years before this play, and she hasnt lived up to that. Weigh the 2 commitments, which one would you guys hold more sacred? Maybe im wrong, but a month is long enough to decide if you love someone or not. A month is long enough to decide if you CAN love someone again. A month is GOD darnED long enough for whatever. God im pissed at her. I feel so much better though. Calling the divorce attorney on monday and she'll really get the picture then. Maybe she'll realize what shes lost. A guy who loves with all of his heart no matter how he feels himself. A guy that would literally do anything for her. A guy with a real good job, whos supported her through college and after. A guy willing to love her daughter JUST like she was my own blood. A family who took them in with completely open arms willing to do anything to support her. She rejected all of that, why? Who knows, its never enough for her. Nothing is ever enough. Not enough money, shes spent almost all of it. Not enough time. Not enough this, not enough that. I AM DONE with her. And i thank everyone here for giving me support while my wife would not. THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU!