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New Member

Date Joined Sep 2010
Total Posts : 2
   Posted 9/10/2010 12:18 PM (GMT -6)   
I woke up this morning feeling horrible. I have felt this way for the past few weeks but this is the worst I have felt. I have been having stomach problems, headaches, crying incessantly, no energy, not wanting to do anything that I used to do. I have 3 children and a husband and sometimes I feel like they would be better off if I weren't even here. I have missed work so much in the past month or so. I am self employed and clean houses for a living and I have dropped all of my customers except for a few and we could not afford that. I just could not bring myself to face these people or to even leave the house to go to work. I quit smoking 6 weeks ago today and I think this is what may have triggered all of this. I have never felt so worthless and I know in my head that this is a lie but I cannot seem to get rid of the feeling. I know I am not a lazy or weak person but something keeps telling me that that's what everyone thinks I am. I know I am good mother but I keep thinking people think I am not. I just want to have energy and want to do the things I used to do. I want to WANT to play with my kids or make love to my husband. I don't know what to do anymore cry

getting by
Forum Moderator

Date Joined Sep 2007
Total Posts : 42609
   Posted 9/10/2010 12:29 PM (GMT -6)   
Hi Bigad98,

I quit smoking too. It has been about three weeks. It is hard. There is no where to let the stress out. I guess we are both going to have to find a way to release things. It just seemed that smoking took the edge off for me, but don't want to start again. I have gained some weight too, but hope to walk it off.

Keep posting and let us know how you are doing. I hope that your day gets better. Don't let the negative thinking get you down. Try to combat that.

Best wishes,

Hugs, Karen
  Moderator-Depression and fibromyalgia
fibromyalgia, Chronic fatigue, depression,allergies

Veteran Member

Date Joined Jul 2008
Total Posts : 2317
   Posted 9/10/2010 2:30 PM (GMT -6)   
Have you tried the water vapor cigarettes? Some people say that the act of holding a "cigarette" and/or going out to hang out with people on a smoke break makes enough of a difference in how they feel that it's not so tough.
Being off cigarettes for 3 weeks is a huge accomplishment! I'm sure your family must be very proud of you & you should be very proud of yourself. :) And know that no matter what your family is better off with you living. Even people with horrible parents are devastated when they lose their mom or dad. But you actually sound like you really care about your kids, so that would be even worse. Please do not do that to your children. Put those thoughts out of your mind. Every time you're thinking something like that, say the opposite thing out loud. For example, if you are thinking "My kids would be better off without me here" say out loud "My kids need me & I want to live for them".

Yes, it is a hard, hard fight to beat depression. First, you have to counter the negative thoughts. Then, you have to get more active and do things even when you really don't feel like doing anything. After that, you need to try to figure out what's causing you to get so down about life (medical issues, chemical imbalance, stress, etc). Hang in there, though. If you start fighting depression early & keep at it, it can be managed -- and some people even beat it altogether. Even those of us who don't can still keep up with our family, work, personal care & social obligations nearly all of the time.

Hope that helps! Hang in there.


Elite Member

Date Joined Mar 2009
Total Posts : 20279
   Posted 9/12/2010 11:28 PM (GMT -6)   
from an extremely heavy smoker, many moons ago i quit for 3 and a half yrs,
i would be frantic without them. one thing and day at a time. alike frances and karen, hang in there, we are here for you. you have been brave in posting, keep being brave. oh, welcome. i always forget, mushed brain!!! with compaqssion, jamie

the mad professor
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