Before I left for college my pdoc and I discussed the possibility of me having to get myself into a hospital to deal with this horrible depression. I didn't think much about it since I was doing a little bit better then, but now all of the feelings are coming back.. Doubled..
I couldn't get out of bed today. I'm just exhausted for no reason, and everything is spiraling out of control again. Except this time, I don't have parents to grab me and make me go to the doctor, and I just can't do that by myself without some sort of guilt for wasting my parents money...
I mean, obviously I have to stick it out this first semester, since I'm not the one paying for my college.. I'm just scared to tell my parents that I need to get into some type of recovery program, and maybe even need to take a semester off.. Plus I know that if I drop out now, I'll never want to come back..
What should I do? I've had this thing long enough to know that it isn't going to go away, but even with the meds everything is mounting up again. Is it even worth having my parents being fuming angry with me? And do I really need such a drastic measure taken toward my recovery?