Have you tried therapy yet? You might want to do that before you go to medications. Therapy will help you forgive yourself because that is really what you need to do. Know that you are not judged here and we totally understand what you are going through. This will get better with time, but first you have to acknowledge that what you did was the right thing at the time. You can't change it and you do have to live with it. But once you forgive yourself that will be easier. I think you realize this already by the sound of your post. We all make mistakes, and choices that we wished we hadn't. But the truth is that you can't change it and when it is the right time, you will have a baby. I don't think you are being punished, this is just the way that things are working out right now. Have patience and have faith. Everything will be as it should. Keep posting if you feel like. I highly recommend some counseling and then possibly medications. See what happens. Remember that you are a good person. Try not to be so hard on yourself.
Moderator-Depression and fibromyalgia
fibromyalgia, Chronic fatigue, depression,allergies