This is a tough one and as I don't know anything about your background or believes I will have to agree with Frances ~ professional advice may be the best thing for you to do. Please keep in mind that online love and love in the real world can be two different things.
You deserve to be happy so do look for a counselor.
~~Kitt~~Moderator: Anxiety/Panic, Osteoarthritis, GERD/Heartburn and Heart/Cardiovascular Disease. www.healingwell.com"If you can't change the world, change your world"