Need help dealing with seperation from my husband

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New Member

Date Joined Oct 2010
Total Posts : 1
   Posted 10/18/2010 3:08 PM (GMT -6)   
I am new at this and I'm not sure how to do this.  Let me start by saing My husban and I have been married for 11 years.  We have been together for 18 years.  We have two wonderful boys and a business together.  Unfortunately our business has hit very hard times.  We were once successful but now are having trouble making ends meet.  I stress out everyday about paying bills and putting food on the table for the kids.  I have made many mistakes in my life both personally and professionally.  In May my husband had a big talk and were not sure if we could work things out.  In July he moved out of the house.  It has been a struggle ever since.  I am finding myself crying all the time.  Some days I find it hard to get out of bed.  I do because of my children.  I have pushed myself on to my husband.  I want him to come home and work things out.  I find that I am having trouble just giving him the space he needs.  Lately we fight everyday.  When I sould start to get on with things we would talk and get along.  When things seem to get better something would be said or done and then we end up fighting for days.  I can't aford counseling.  I was wondering if anyone could help me get over the depression and the fact that my husband left me.  I don't want to fight with him anymore.  I try but I don't think I am doing a good jub.  He has made it that it is all my fault.  That I am the only one to blame for everything that is going on.  I do not know why I still love him but I do.  I really need help.

getting by
Forum Moderator

Date Joined Sep 2007
Total Posts : 42612
   Posted 10/18/2010 3:41 PM (GMT -6)   
Hi there,

Welcome to the HealingWell Depression forum. If I were you, I would check out the department of human services and apply for some assistance. You should qualify because of your situation. I am sure that you don't have a lot of extra funds. So please do check that out.

I have to say that we are not professionals here and can't fix what is going on wrong for you at this point. But we can give advice from past experiences and give you our opinion and offer you are support.

My best suggestion is to take this one step at a time. Simplify things for yourself. Break down tasks to make it less overwhelming for you. Raising children by yourself is very hard. But try to keep the children's best interest at heart and you can't go wrong.

You might want to look for some books on how to deal with depression. Reading is a wonderful way to get help. Most of all, be good to yourself. Take things slow and never give up. I am sure that there will be more members on to offer advice to you. Keep your chin up my friend.

Hugs, Karen
  Moderator-Depression and fibromyalgia
fibromyalgia, Chronic fatigue, depression,allergies

Veteran Member

Date Joined Jul 2008
Total Posts : 2317
   Posted 10/18/2010 10:58 PM (GMT -6)   
Hi LMB2,
I think Karen gave you some great advice. In addition to DHS, some therapists offer free/sliding scale services based on ability to pay. That might also be something to look into. In addition, there are some university counseling programs that provide marriage & family counseling at no cost. But I think the first thing might be to straighten out some of your own thoughts and feelings.
If you're struggling to find a place to get help on your own, your general practitioner/family doctor should be able to give you some names of therapists who will work on a sliding scale (usually $5-15/session) or for free.

wish I could offer more help.

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