I must have done something horrific at some point to desereve a life like mine.
I have no one.
My dad wants nothing to do with me for he is unable to take responsibility for his own actions.
My mom thinks it is okay for me to suffer so long as everyone else is content (she outright told me this).
My sister is self-absorbed and could care less about anyone but herself.
The rest of my family have fallen victim to my moms lies and have thus sided with her.
As for friends, I have none. They all disappeared at the first sign of a few on my arm. Not really friends I guess...
My entire life I have suffered the repercussions of other peoples actions. Pushed aside, forgotten, and left to silently scream in pain.
I am the one who has been permanently scarred with an eating disorder, and severe depression. Why does no one care?
I am the one who was bestowed upon the unfortunate fate of being told that in order to smile again I need surgery. What parents would start a process to attaining this only to abandon their daugher a few months prior to surgery after years of preparation (when I say years, I mean since I was in elementary school...I am now 19). I am unable to eat properly and am speech imparied as result. My parents don't care. It is not their impairments. Just their daughters.
All of this leads to the absence of self-esteem and severe hatred towards myself.
Basically, I am treated as one who is disposable; After someone has obtained their use out of me, I am tossed aside and left to slowly decompose.
I am sorry sweetie, we aren't allowed to discuss self harm on this forum. Here is a site that might help you:
Post Edited By Moderator (getting by) : 11/5/2010 6:20:26 AM (GMT-6)