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New Member

Date Joined Nov 2010
Total Posts : 4
   Posted 11/7/2010 6:45 PM (GMT -6)   
This is my first post. I think I have depression and anxiety although I have never been diagnosed. Somtimes I have a very upbeat personality so no one realizes that I have it. Sometimes I stay in bed all day and watch movies, sometimes the same movie over and over again. Depression does run in my family, My mother is depressed after the suicide of her brother. She is on Prozac and some other medications. I usually avoid talks like this. I don't want to be like my mother. I don't like to think that because it runs in the family that I will get it. Sometimes it's hard for me to do everyday things such as going to the library. I will drive there and see the building and I'll get nervous and have to re-drive and calm myself to go in. Sometimes I don't go in because i'm afraid of the libarians, I am nervous to talk to them which I know is silly because they are very nice.
 I work in an enviroment that is very stressful to me and my co-workers. I often call out once a month because I have a bad feeling about the day. I sometimes have dreams that the building will be attacked by a shooter. The building does have security and you do need a code to get in. One time I overheard a co-worker say that she is afraid a former employee will come back and kill everyone, I was amazed that she had the same feeling and did not like that we both maybe have a premonition about something like that happening. It is had for me to have a job where I have to interact with people. When I was younger I worked at a Donut shop and the regulars, mostly nice, would terrify me. I thought that they were obsessed with me and would follow me home.
It may seem that I am very closeted with my interactions but I usually do things that other people would be afraid of doing. I have no problem going to a concert by myself and meeting people there or in the classroom, I am usually the life of the room. Everday is a struggle, sometimes I have a week where I am fine other times the daily errands cripple me, like going to the supermarket.
That's it for now.

Regular Member

Date Joined Oct 2010
Total Posts : 59
   Posted 11/7/2010 8:24 PM (GMT -6)   
  Hello  i would like to start out by saying please see a doctor, this is the only way you will find out.  I statred withdrawing from things and people at first, then came the mini panic attacks.  I eventually went into severe panic anexity,brought on by the sexual abuse i had been dealing with for over 6 years, it finally caught up with me and i had to leave the job of 13 years. I was making a wonderful salary, great vacations, take off anytime i needed, etc. I could no longer be silent and thats when i went into panic mode and my symptons all went downhill for the worse.  I would never wish the spiral that i went down on anyone and i would love to help you any way i can by being their for you anytime to talk day or night! Hope things get better and you feel at peace with yourself!
God Bless

getting by
Forum Moderator

Date Joined Sep 2007
Total Posts : 42608
   Posted 11/8/2010 8:14 AM (GMT -6)   
It does sound like you have some issues to work through. Sounds like paranoia to me. That could be a form of depression, I am not sure. But the best thing to do would be to make a doctor's appointment and discuss what you told us. If there is anything else you would like to discuss, feel free. As long as it falls within the rules. I hope that things get better soon. Do see your doctor about this. Maybe print out what you wrote here so that you don't forget to tell things.

Hugs, Karen...
  Moderator-Depression and fibromyalgia
fibromyalgia, Chronic fatigue, depression,allergies
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