Welcome to HealingWell and sorry to read of all your problems. I do not feel that we can get you out of your situation but we can advise you to seek counseling to help you learn to deal with your feelings. This would be a great place to beginning healing from your many traumas in your past.
It will also help you learn to increase your self esteem so do look into counseling.
We are here to support you and please know we care.
~~Kitt~~Moderator: Anxiety/Panic, Osteoarthritis, GERD/Heartburn and Heart/Cardiovascular Disease. www.healingwell.com"If you can't change the world, change your world"