New Found? Depression at 34

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Date Joined Dec 2010
Total Posts : 1
   Posted 12/5/2010 11:10 AM (GMT -6)   
Adoloscence: Local University before school for diving practice, school, followed by gymnastics practice. If no gymnastics that day, off to the field for Pop Warner practice. Long days at a very young age. But very active, and no matter what I was put in to tire me out I was still bouncing off walls. I listened to everyone around me.....
Growing up, you quickly learn what needs to be done in order to survive. Be it kicking ass, taking pills, just doing your work, taking a walk, etc...
I learned that all of these used in concert were most effective. My pill of choice was klonopin, and after a few surgeries due to stupidity I learned to like percocet. This combination made me feel unstoppable. Not only would the ideas come to me, but I was able to take action on them and make things happen. I rocked this combination for years. I hit a wall when I was let go from a job in the financial services and went to rehab. I was freshly married and said OK it's time to feel the pain again. Rehab worked as far as I don't want a pill near me, I do not drink but I began smoking a ton and the time for exercise was no longer there. I got fat and I am a shorter guy, so this also affects me. I jumped back into a similar job, and realized the environment I felt like could excel in was no longer a place I wanted to be. I could no longer hide the fact that I was disgusted by what my staff was doing just to get to work in the morning. I was let go. I am now here wondering what do I do with my life? How can I look at my wife and be optimistic again? How do I become happy with myself again? I was never depressed, I just got pissed off and dealt with it.
 Does anyone know of a case like this? It's going to be a long road back to health (in the mind, body, soul sense), but I simply want to be able to catch a thought and my breath again.

Post Edited By Moderator (getting by) : 12/6/2010 2:14:52 PM (GMT-7)

getting by
Forum Moderator

Date Joined Sep 2007
Total Posts : 42609
   Posted 12/6/2010 4:17 PM (GMT -6)   
Hi Chris,

Recovering from drug/alcohol use is a slow process. Picking up where you left off can seem strange. But you are in for a lot of changes and they should be positive, even if they don't seem like it at the time. Be patient with yourself. Take life one day at a time. You will get better in time. Just look at it this way... "today is the first day of the rest of my life" You will get there. Keep posting.

Hugs, Karen
  Moderator-Depression and fibromyalgia
fibromyalgia, Chronic fatigue, depression,allergies
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