I'm not entirely sure what you want or need to her about my situation other than I am lost in myself. You need to know Anxiety, a Borderline personality, depression, eating disorders, they all seem to be the least of what I'm up against. And yes, I deal with them every day.
Anyways, your probably wondering why these are the least of my worries. Well, If it could be said that I was slipping before, then I suppose now it seems I'm in a landslide. I have no idea what to do. I'm flunking out of University. I got the news that I'm now on academic probation, "the first sign of dismissal" as they put it... I have no idea how I'm going to face my parents. they're going to be, well you know, ticked, heated, furious. The last thing I need, this is going to ruin my life. As if it wasn't already in shambles. I have 2 other problems like that in my life, same magnitude or greater, different circumstances. What did I ever do to get this bad karma, Damara, juju stuff... I don't know what to do. I'm scared, terrified as a matter of fact, there's no one to talk to, no one to trust.
My only escape is knocking myself out to sleep for hours. I know this isn't good, I'm not an idiot. I just don't know what else to do, there is no other way to get my mind off of everything. And even in these states I still think a million miles an hour. I just can't stop thinking, it scares me, makes me to stray away from reality itself. I don't know how to deal with myself anymore, I don't know what to do..
I am sorry that I had to edit your post but we aren't allowed to discuss illegal drugs, medical marijuana, suicide or self harm on this forum.
Thanks for understanding.
Post Edited By Moderator (getting by) : 12/29/2010 1:52:13 PM (GMT-7)