I need some help please!!!!!!!!!!!!!
my gf broke up with me about a year ago, we dated for almost 8 months, everything was amazing between us , never fought , everything was just great, she wasa little bit reserved , and never introduced me to all her friends and i felt like i was kept out of the circle...it did not bother me at first but as we started getting serious it became an issue. at first i was not looking for a serious relationship but she tottaly won me over , her letters to me and her actions , and how much she was in love with me....then i gave in to her and opened up, which i normaly dont let my guards down easily..... i treated this girl like never treaded any girl before, i loved her from the bottom of my heart ...one day she said." i cant be in a relationship..i have school..work and other family issues...i love you but i cant be commited " she broke my heart like no one ever did...i am 30 years old and never felt like this ....i went thru serious depression....thank god..i found the strenght to get my self in the right track ....get in shape again, get my self busy ... changed jobs, and changed few things in my life that finallly feeling better...however we kind of stayed in touch ..and we hooked up few times (which i totally regret) ,
since we broke up ..i still sent her flowers at least 3 times, and gifts for her birthday..and took her out .....however few months ago..i realized that i just cant be friends with her ...i feel like i cant move on....and i told her that i we can not be friends ....i also sent her this email..
To My Dearest xxxxxxx.,
I thought a lot about writing you this letter since I seem to be lost of words
about what I really want to tell you and share when I am around you, or words
may not come out as I would like to, ...
First, I want to thank you for the most wonderful time we spent together, I
cherished and enjoyed every minute of it, just the simple nights out together or
with friends seemed to be precious and unforgettable . The trip to new port
beach was one of the most beautiful time that we spent , and Disneyland , new
years and so on... ....but I will always remember the day we spent it in my room
, doing nothing yet it seemed one of the most amazing time ever, and that is so
hard to forget , because you can do absolutely nothing and yet enjoy the
person’s company and feel just…. free from the world, every time I had you in
my arms feeling your soft skin I would look deeper into your beautiful eyes
and see how happy you will get and just stress free , almost felt like you
wanted to disconnect from the world and just enjoy that moment …and I
promised my self to try to make you always feel that way .
We have been apart for months now and I would still think of you and your
beautiful smile I know we had so many variables that been thrown at us and
impacted our relationship but I guess that is the nature of life and the beauty
of the experiences we face. I guess they are two types of people that come into
your life, some they go and others are simply hard to let go ….and believe me
when we tell people how we feel about them and truly express ourselves and our
feelings is an amazing thing, you never if we will have the chance to do so
later on in life...… because those people did matter to us and maybe they still
do.. I want you to know that I always wish you happiness and love from
the bottom of my heart. I pray for your mom every chance I have, although we
never met, god knows how much I pray and care for her .
Recently we start hanging out again, besides having you in my arms and kissing
you all night ,feeling your skin ....I cant tell you how much I enjoy talking to
you ,laughing with you, tell you about my day and hearing about yours... just
simply the passionate moments we spend is amazing to me, .... ...feelings start
coming back ...I care so much about you and I never ask for anything in return,
I would do anything to make you happy ....you have absolutely no idea what I
would do in order to make you smile and love you forever, because I genuinely
care about you , and my feelings are true and honest ! I can not go through
another roller coaster..... I am at a point of my life that I have great things
falling in place and I wish you would be the person to share my happiness and
success with, I know life is not perfect but I loved you for who you are ...I
did not care what you do, where you came from, what you did in the past. nothing
matters to me ..I just ...wanted you babe !!
You mentioned once you hadn't been deeply happy in a while and I hope I was able
to make the experience (mostly) positive for you and that you don't give up
searching,, I think you deserve love and be loved, its one of the most beautiful
things in life.
As I write this today, the words are hard to flow. It is not my nature to be
expressive. But no matter what I want you to know that I do care. My words will
never be able to describe exactly how I feel so, let me end this letter with 3
simple words, straight from my heart:
I love you.
she has been texting me and emailed me once to say hi how are you , i want to hear from you...but i enevr texted back or emailed her back for the past few months....i really dont know what to do !!!!!!!!!!!
please help me with any advise and i am so sorry for the long letter !!!!
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