Welcome to the HealingWell Depression forum. You have come to a good place. We will try to help and support you.
I think the doctor made the wrong choice of antidepressants if they made you worse. Know that there are many others to try and sometimes it takes a while to find what is right for each individual.
I think that you should get into talk therapy also. It really helps. I go to a psychologist for my meds and a psychologist for therapy.
You have been through a lot. It wouldn't be normal not to be depressed. We often get depressed after having a baby too. You are young and took on a responsibility taking care of your parent while they were dieing. Just that alone can make a person depressed. I am glad that you went to bereavement counseling.
I am so sorry for your losses. It can be so hard. I lost my first husband due to lung cancer in 2000. It was very difficult. But things move so fast, you don't have time to think about it much. It is when all of it is over that is really hard. Plus watching somebody that you love die.
We all know what depression is like. It is a struggle. Keep posting and know that we all care about you.
I hope that you start to feel better soon. If you can't get to a counselor or a doctor for meds, try reading about depression. There is a good book called "feeling good". It is very helpful.
Moderator-Depression and fibromyalgia
fibromyalgia, Chronic fatigue, depression, allergies