Sometimes shock as an emotion...can be a good thing....

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Veteran Member

Date Joined May 2008
Total Posts : 705
   Posted 2/22/2011 4:01 PM (GMT -6)   

I’m a little dumb-founded right now (for lack of better words). I have shared on this forum how I’m trying to hold on, but I know that depression is rearing its ugly head inside of me.  I’ve been going thru so much emotion these last few weeks. I kept telling myself that I have an appointment soon with my psychiatrist and that hopefully he can help me.

Fast forward to a about an hour ago. I went in to see my psychiatrist, and sat down and told him that things have changed, I have been really feeling depressed .  (It feels hard for me to even be able to say it to him, but I am determined to get my feeling out because in order to get help, I need to tell my doctor what is going on). So he asked me a few questions about my life, and stress, any additional stress at work? Yes…struggling to do my job and how my weekends are not  used for fun, but to recoup from the previous work week, how people are getting laid off…..with me..yes…I have been feeling worse and it is making me feel alienated from my family because I spend so much time being sick…and my oldest son 20 still doesn’t have a job yet..yadda yadda…so I get it all out and then he starts:

I keep talking, and I notice that he is not looking at me but looking at my file and then he interrupts me and starts asking me questions about my medication…(I still did not see where this was going so I figured…ok…) so I told him what I was currently taking as of my last visit with my pain management doctor

·         Duragesic Patch .75

·         Oxy IR 15 mg for break thru pain

·         Nuvigil 250

·         Ativan up to 2 mgs (which he prescribes) at night for sleep

·         Prisitiq 50 gm

He then precedes to tell me that he feels I am taking so much medicine that perhaps if I could think about coming off of some pain medication, he would consider either an increase in anti-depression medication or a change, but that I am taking so much medication, I could end up having a stroke!!!

He said the nuvigil and prisitiq both acted as ant depression medication, without seeing on of his therapist (he has been after me for a while to see one of his “therapists” I went to see one a few times, it was a waste of time for me and I was not going to pay $100.00 a month to see someone who was not helping me. So I told him, something has to be done, I can’t keep calling my husband all day and crying. So then he said that either my primary doctor or my rheumatologist should call him to see what to do, I told him my primary doctor referred me to a pain management doctor because she could not manage my pain (in her own words…Fibromyalgia is complicated and every changing medication is available, but we don’t have time to research the latest information for it.

I’m just so upset, I feel like a freak now for taking so much medication, and I feel helpless.

getting by
Forum Moderator

Date Joined Sep 2007
Total Posts : 42609
   Posted 2/22/2011 5:49 PM (GMT -6)   
You are not a freak. You are doing what you are doing to relieve pain and to stay focused and fight some of the fatigue. I would be bummed that he wanted me to change it. But my psychiatrist even said that pain meds cause depression. But I look at it this way. The pain causes worse depression.

I guess all you can do is take this as it comes. They should wean you down with the pain meds. But I went up to 100 mg on pristiq and it really helped me. I wonder if the pdoc will do that for you. Keep posting and get it out. I am sure that you are feeling bad right now, but there is no sense in letting it get to you, that will only cause your pain to be worse.

Best wishes to you. Try to take this as it comes. Don't think badly of yourself, you only did what the doctors for pain had you do. And it might not necessarily be all that wrong. It depends on your pain.

Take care. Get some rest.

Hugs, Karen
Moderator-Depression and fibromyalgia

fibromyalgia, Chronic fatigue, depression, allergies

Elite Member

Date Joined Mar 2009
Total Posts : 20279
   Posted 2/23/2011 4:30 AM (GMT -6)   
LOVE YOU FOR YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! JAMIE. KEEP STRONG.


Veteran Member

Date Joined May 2008
Total Posts : 705
   Posted 2/23/2011 10:35 AM (GMT -6)   
He made me want to cry yesterday, it was if he was insinuating that I was a pill pop type person. I really don't think that he needed to say that I could have a stroke, now that I think of it, he mentioned before that I was "on a lot of medication"....I don't think I am on a lot of med, I mean, yes I take pain medication. I can not work without them. I would be in bed most days crying and praying I could sleep. Tylenol, Advil (although I will take advil sometimes on top of my medication when its really bad) do nothing for me. I felt like he did not want to get involved, or he was scared I may be some sort of a risk. I looked at him like he was crazy when he said..he could not do anything I said...I sure can't keep calling my husband all day telling him that I feel sad and crying all the time either. Then he sat down next to me and wrote out whe he felt was a senario of the whole medication thing
he did this:
pain patch
he circled them and wrote which doctor was giving me what medicine. He said he was only giving me the ativan and that I should go back to the person who was giving me the majority of the medication or any change. Oh, but then he sure didn't have any problem trying to get me to see one of his therapists again. I guess I have talked to and see too many people on all different forums that take more medication than I do and still get the right anti-depression medication, heck some folks take more than one anti-depression medication in addition to all their other meds. I had false hope with him. I need to learn to not do that so much.
I got a phone call last night from my PM doctor, he gave me a name of a psychiatrist that deals with chronic pain patients so, I think this should help. The person is prolly almost an hour away from me, but at this point, it they can help and I can see them once I month or so, I guess I will just have to take time off or my vacation time to go see him, if he can help me.
Thanks for listening Karen & jamiee!!

Elite Member

Date Joined Mar 2009
Total Posts : 20279
   Posted 2/23/2011 11:16 PM (GMT -6)   
my shrink is working on my pain. they are medication specialists. i am on many meds, all of them i require, if you did not require them then your doc would not be prescribing them. hold your head up hi, and keep being strong, jamie



Mrs. Dani
Veteran Member

Date Joined Jun 2009
Total Posts : 2787
   Posted 2/25/2011 9:43 AM (GMT -6)   
Dear Monica,

    Good morning *hugg* I hope you are doing a bit better today. You ve been though a lot lately. I hope you are remembering to take it easy when you can. 

     You know it is pretty common that various "complimentary" doctors do not understand Chronic Pain. Chiropractors, Physical Therapists, Psychologists.... the same "myths" about chronic pain patients and their medications apply not just to society but also to various other "doctors". It is hard, to have to fight against society. It seems unfair we have to fight against various medical personnel too. My only suggestion would be to explain why you are on the medications. If they still do not understand, then you know you at least tried.

     I have long since believed that mental health professionals that specialize in chronic and terminal illness are the best for us. They have extensive knowledge with regards to all aspects of chronic pain. They are a valuable resource to the chronic pain community. If there is anyway that you can see one, it would be worth it. Also, please do not be hard on yourself. Chronic pain is hard for even the strongest of people. It is okay for us to be down and to feel angry at times. The difference is that you are being proactive about it and doing the best you can to fight it. Please, take it easy. Rest when you are able.

    Know you are in our hearts here!

TWO roads diverged in a yellow wood
And sorry I could not travel both
And be one traveler, long I stood

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