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New Member

Date Joined Feb 2011
Total Posts : 1
   Posted 2/28/2011 6:53 PM (GMT -6)   
I suppose I've gotten so caught up in trying to help others and make them feel good about themselves that i've lost myself. I always just kind of mold myself into different shapes to fit the moment and what's expected of me..... Honestly, I don't really care about the others any more. they are so hateful to me that they have no right to my kindness. But I don't know any other way to live. I want to be different, and show them that our "friendship" is not the way it should be. the kindness should be mutual, not one person being put down while the other expects them to give gentle words.... right?? I just don't know who anyone is anymore

Regular Member

Date Joined Feb 2011
Total Posts : 36
   Posted 3/1/2011 1:58 AM (GMT -6)   
I understand how you feel, i've had lots of friends who were very inconsiderate to me whle i felt like I was always the kind gentle one.. I hate offending people and making them feel bad, yet people seem to have no problem doing it to me. I think the issue might be one of low self esteem, at least I know that's part of it for me. We need to learn how to put ourselves first, and not worry so much about pleasing others. Have you talked to a counselor about learning ways to love yourself first? maybe next time someone is unkind to you, you can either confront them or just try to be more assertive. I know it's hard i have this problem too..hang in there, it will get better. You deserve to be treated with the kindness you give others <3

Elite Member

Date Joined Mar 2009
Total Posts : 20279
   Posted 3/1/2011 2:28 AM (GMT -6)   
yes....................what hybridmoments said. ' you deserve to be treated with the kindness you give others'.

me, i say, be you, be true and love you. you are a precious human being of this earth, and with gifts and talents unique to only you. hold your head high, you are a good and kind person, i can see that, thus keep your chin up. it is ok to be assertive in the right moment too.



getting by
Forum Moderator

Date Joined Sep 2007
Total Posts : 42609
   Posted 3/1/2011 7:44 AM (GMT -6)   
Think of yourself first and foremost. It isn't being selfish. This gives you more energy to help others if that is what you enjoy. This doens't mean disrespect others, just put yourself first. Do some good things for you. Then doing for others wont be so exhausting.

Hugs, Karen
Moderator-Depression and fibromyalgia

fibromyalgia, Chronic fatigue, depression, allergies
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