what does "I dont want to ruin our friendship" mean?
1
I just want to be friends - 100.0%
0
I want to have a relationship but am afraid to ruin friendship - 0.0%
0
Lets just see what happens - 0.0%
0
other - 0.0%

 
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bjohnson
New Member


Date Joined Mar 2011
Total Posts : 2
   Posted 3/4/2011 7:10 PM (GMT -6)   
i am new to this. doc has me on sertraline and i have had 2 sessions with psychologist but it just doesnt seem to be enough lately. i have been single for almost ten years and thru facebook met up with a former high school classmate. we started hanging out over a month ago and things were going well. she asked me if we should date a little over a week ago but i told her i wasnt sure, lets take it slow. after spending more time with her i realized yeah what am i doing. i told her i thought it was a great idea to date and she told me she didnt want to ruin our friendship. now we dont talk, text or hang out. back to being all alone and it sucks bad. constantly screwing up every good thing in my life including my relationship with my daughter even when i do things with the best intentions. i am tired of this and dont know how much more i can take!

getting by
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Sep 2007
Total Posts : 42434
   Posted 3/4/2011 8:31 PM (GMT -6)   
Can you see your psychologist more often? How long have you been going? Do you see her once a month? Wondering how you could increase your chances of getting more help.

Have you told either of them how you are feeling? How long have you been on the sertraline? If you are just beginning this, it could take some time before you start feeling better. If you have been on meds for a few months, you may need some type of adjustment. So really, talking to the psychiatrist and psychologist is where you need to begin.

Do keep posting. I didn't mean to ask so many questions, but want to know where to start. Or what we are working with.

You can ruin a friendship by getting into a relationship with that person. And if the relationship does not last, your friendship often goes with it. So this person values your friendship and I wouldn't want to ruin that.

Take care.

Hugs, Karen
Moderator-Depression and fibromyalgia


fibromyalgia, Chronic fatigue, depression, allergies

bjohnson
New Member


Date Joined Mar 2011
Total Posts : 2
   Posted 3/5/2011 5:06 PM (GMT -6)   
I have only been on sertraline for a month. I have never been on anything other than antibiotics my whole life. The side effects were rough for 2 weeks but have really eased up. I forgot to take my dose in the morning yesterday as normal but took it as soon as I could, about 12hrs later. I'm not sure if this contributed to my mood but maybe. I have only had 2 sessions with my psychologist and am trying to see him once weekly depending on openings and my work schedule. Yesterday was the first session with him going through a history starting with my family and it brought back some bad memories and emotions that continued long after my session with him. Paert of the reason for the history is to identify reasons for why I am an alcoholic(I'm in recovery with 7 months sober next Wednesday), why I have isolated myself and been alone for so long including what is going on in this current relationship, and my overall perception of myself. I am feeling better today and writing down some things that went through my mind last night to take to my next session as things to focus on and deal with. I don't want to ruin the friendship I have with my friend but when I date someone I would like to be close friends with that person. I won't date someone I don't or can't have a friendship with. It does seem in the past I get this "I don't want to ruin our friendship" or "I just want to be friends" line and that is where it stays. I treat women with courtesy and respect and always hear from them why can't I find a good man and then I start seeing them and I get these lines. I feel more and more all the time that I will continue to be single and alone til I die and I dont like that idea.

getting by
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Sep 2007
Total Posts : 42434
   Posted 3/5/2011 6:54 PM (GMT -6)   
Try not to project negativity into the future. Be optimistic about what could happen. Work on getting you better and things will fall into place. And it will probably be when you least expect it. We never know what life has to offer us or what the future holds. But we do know about the present and how important it is to get completely better. It is best really not to be in a relationship until you get things in tact. I know it is nice to think about but in reality, we need to work on ourselves first.

I am glad that you are feeling better. I hope that it continues for you.

Take care,

Hugs, Karen
Moderator-Depression and fibromyalgia


fibromyalgia, Chronic fatigue, depression, allergies

theHTreturns...
Elite Member


Date Joined Mar 2009
Total Posts : 20186
   Posted 3/5/2011 7:13 PM (GMT -6)   
me too. jamie :-)
SCHIZO-AFFECTIVE DISORDER, EMOTIONALLY UNSTABLE PERSONALITY DISORDER, BORDERLINE TYPE -AXIS 2 , BI-POLAR AFFECTIVE DISORDER AXIS 1

REMEMBER TO LOVE YOU. BE YOU AND BE TRUE.
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