I think you need to come to realize that you have done what you could and that she has to be the one to help herself. Most of the help you give her is only enabling her to continue what she is doing. And remember it isn't her. It is the disease. I do agree you need to take a step back so you can get some objectivity of the situation. When you love somebody and you are too close to them, you can't see things for what they really are. Try to convince her into getting more help. Does she see a counselor regularly? She is hurting everybody around her really and can't see it.
Take a break from the situation. Let her know, if she asks, that you need a break and that you are trying to take care of yourself. Let her know that she needs to be proactive about getting some help. You might have to go so far as to tell her that you aren't going to help her anymore until you can see that she is helping herself. And don't feel guilty about it. It is called tough love. It is obvious that you love her, but now it is her time to help herself before it is too late.
I hope that this helps some.
Moderator-Depression and fibromyalgia
fibromyalgia, Chronic fatigue, depression, allergies