I went through a horrible divorce with a man that told me he loved me very much but "had to do it." 5 years later I now believe if someone truly loves someone, they will do WHATEVER it takes to get them....I mean, you have to respect your ex's wishes, but there's ALWAYS something you can be doing. Like, if she doesn't want you to call her or see her for a little while, write her a quick note and mail it, or a card, or short texts - even if she doesn't reply, stop by and brush the snow off her car in the morning (I know it's prolly not snowing anymore but you know what I'm getting at). Love doesn't give up and love doesn't expect anything in return. She'll notice your commitment and change of heart but it will take a little time and you've got to be consistent. Pay attention to her life.... like the details of her life.... what does she do, does she go to college, what classes, how's her job, her home, her family, her health. If you send her notes just asking how her "class" went or "how her relationship with her mom is coming along." These are just examples but do you get my drift? Make it about her, don't bring up you, your feelings (you had your chance and blew it) now you gotta SHOW her, PROVE it. Don't bring up anything about yourself, let her ask, but even then turn it back around to her and, again, something SPECIFIC, like "oh I remember the other day you were telling me about ______, how'd that turn out? Or, you know, it's mother's day coming up, ask her if you can get something for her mom (it means a lot to girls when you SHOW your care for the people THEY love), BELIEVE me, she'll be flabbergasted. There's not too many men that all they wanna talk about or know about is what's going on in their girlfriend's life, and those that do, just listen a little then it's back to them. What's her favorite candy (drop some off unexpectedly), how bout a friend or sibling she's close with that you could begin a relationship with?? You have no idea how much that would mean to her if you actually put yourself out there by getting ahold of her close friend to say, "I wanna do whatever I can to PROVE & SHOW I love her, can you help me?"
Good luck, I'm a 37 yr old woman that is very pretty and have had MANY relationships cuz of it, I now have a wonderful husband and a wonderful marriage because I have finally learned to put HIM first, and have learned to do what I've just told you...a BIG change for me. I believe with all my heart this is the key to a long-lasting, joyful relationship!
And, by the way, don't complain to too many of your friends about this....seriously, they'll just wanna give you advice, and you'll get confused, keep your focus, stay mature, and keep this to yourself and BELIEVE in your love for her and her love for you.
And.....keep us posted, k?
Blondie37_Fibromyalgia_terrible back of neck/shoulder area pain_degenerative discs_chronic pain for 15 years_new to pain management_can't take ibuprofin due to taking too many_have taken and tried everything from antidepressants to morphine to lyrica to muscle relaxers to xanax to valium to celebrex, etc.