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HollyLynn524
New Member


Date Joined May 2011
Total Posts : 2
   Posted 5/3/2011 7:15 PM (GMT -6)   
This is my first message I'm posting on here, so I really hope no one judges me. I am a senior in high school who got kicked out of my mothers house in July 2010. I am now in the system as "homeless" and I live with my boyfriend's family. My mother used my credit, and ran it up to 1,000 dollars, and I am now undergoing pressing charges. I have no college plans due to the fact I have no money and the state is not helping me out enough, and also because I qualify for certain programs but those programs do not provide housing. I am not welcome to stay here after I graduate in June, because they were just helping me out so I can finish high school, and I honestly dont know where I'm going to go. People are telling me I should join the service, and no offense to any of our military I think they are beyond incredible but for me? I have been planning to attend college since I'm little, and all I want is to become successful and make a good living to support myself. But now I cant even do that. My mother was abusive both mentally and physically for the 16 years I was under her watch, and it still is effecting me to this day. Not to mention she has manipulated my three younger siblings to completely hating my guts, refusing to talk to me and want anything to do with me. My father is a drunk and a drug addict - I asked him to call me today so I had someone to talk to since I was histerically crying and he called me drunk off his butt. That helped me feel a whole lot better. I barely know my dad, but I do know that he is such a laid back, easy going, soft spoken person - WHEN SOBER. When hes drunk hes loud and obnoxious and just stupid acting. It doesnt make me feel any better, it makes me feel worse! The only other family are my 2 aunts here, who honestly think they help me out but in all reality do nothing for me since I got kicked out. They complain I'm not going to college and I'm not gonna make it anywhere and I'm just going to end up a knocked up teen mom. Well thanks for boosting my -500 self confidence. My mother has killed my self esteem, and I dont even know if I'll ever get it back. I feel ugly, stupid, worthless and so much more. I hate myself, I always feel upset, down or angry with myself or others. I just feel so beside myself.....my boyfriend doesnt understand half of what I go through, he's nineteen years old and is so immature compared to me. I guess its because I've been through alot, but I want someone thats gonna be there for me, since I dont have anyone obviously....and all we do is fight over the stupidest crap! I mean I'm young and all, but I know that a relationship is supposed to be about helping the other person get through things and just helping them enjoy life. I dont know if I'm definitly suffering from depression. From my point of view though, I do believe that I am. Ugh and unfortunately, all of this you just read? Isnt even a quarter of what is going on in my abnormal, crazy life....

15
New Member


Date Joined May 2011
Total Posts : 19
   Posted 5/3/2011 7:57 PM (GMT -6)   
This is terrible, after reading this I changed my mind quickly on how bad I thought I had things. I guess sometimes we never really stop to realize that some ppl in the world have it worse than you do. I feel bad for you and you shouldn't have to go thru this alone. I think that your boyfriend needs to stop and realize what all you have been thru and help you out more. And I don't understand why the state isn't doing much to help you. If they know that your mother was the one doing all of this to you, then why arn't they taking action, especially if she abused you phisically!!? You are NOT ugly nor stupid, you have made it to your senior year in high school! That is a great acomplishment! Be proud of yourself and who you are! I know I don't know you, but I'm proud of you, you're been thru alot and in my eyes you're a very strong person to be able to go thru all of this! Keep your head up and focus on bettering your future!

theHTreturns...
Elite Member


Date Joined Mar 2009
Total Posts : 20279
   Posted 5/4/2011 6:32 AM (GMT -6)   
can you get some counselling and assistance from your welfare service? / human services dept, etc. i send you my healing compassionate prayers hollylynn. you have been real brave, keep strong. other members with more insight to your area and situation will post soon. we care, jamie.
SCHIZO-AFFECTIVE DISORDER, EMOTIONALLY UNSTABLE PERSONALITY DISORDER, BORDERLINE TYPE -AXIS 2 , BI-POLAR AFFECTIVE DISORDER AXIS 1

REMEMBER TO LOVE YOU. BE YOU AND BE TRUE.

stkitt
Elite Member


Date Joined Apr 2007
Total Posts : 32602
   Posted 5/4/2011 8:40 AM (GMT -6)   
Good Morning and welcome to HealingWell,
 
I am sorry to read of your problems.  I agree with Jamie, can you get counseling to help you deal with all your issues and help you find a way to accomplish your goals ? It may seem hopeless right now but there is an answer out there and with help you will find it.
 
I could not participate in your poll as I do not understand all the abbreviations.  Sorry.
 
Hold your head up high and keep on moving forward one step at a time.
 
Kindly,
Kitt
 
 
~~Kitt~~
Moderator: Anxiety/Panic, Osteoarthritis, GERD/Heartburn and Heart/Cardiovascular Disease.
www.healingwell.com

"If you can't change the world, change your world"

getting by
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Sep 2007
Total Posts : 42611
   Posted 5/4/2011 9:57 AM (GMT -6)   
Keep moving forward, don't give up on yourself. Yes you are mature for your age. You can get a pell grant. Look it up on the internet. They will pay for your tuition and books, but you may have to find a part time job to get a place to stay. Best wishes to you. Do call the department of human resources and see if they will help you. You sound like such a sweet person and I am sorry that you are going through this.

Hugs, Karen
Moderator-Depression and fibromyalgia


fibromyalgia, Chronic fatigue, depression, allergies

HollyLynn524
New Member


Date Joined May 2011
Total Posts : 2
   Posted 5/4/2011 1:20 PM (GMT -6)   
Thank you for everyone that replied to my post. My guidance couselor and psycologist in school is doing their absolute best to see what they can find that'll help me out. I want to see a couselor outside of school because my psycologist isnt someone you see like once a week. She's there on a needed basis. Today I went and spoke with her because I was walking around school so down and upset.
But thank you everyone, I'm going to look into everything you all suggested.
-Holly Lynn

stkitt
Elite Member


Date Joined Apr 2007
Total Posts : 32602
   Posted 5/4/2011 2:20 PM (GMT -6)   
Holly,
 
I am glad you are taking advantage of the help that is available and I expect that in the future you will reach your goals.  I admire your determination to get an education and better things for yourself.
 
Gentle Hugs,
Kitt
~~Kitt~~
Moderator: Anxiety/Panic, Osteoarthritis, GERD/Heartburn and Heart/Cardiovascular Disease.
www.healingwell.com

"If you can't change the world, change your world"

theHTreturns...
Elite Member


Date Joined Mar 2009
Total Posts : 20279
   Posted 5/4/2011 11:33 PM (GMT -6)   
i admire your determination too!!!! keep strong, jamie
SCHIZO-AFFECTIVE DISORDER, EMOTIONALLY UNSTABLE PERSONALITY DISORDER, BORDERLINE TYPE -AXIS 2 , BI-POLAR AFFECTIVE DISORDER AXIS 1

REMEMBER TO LOVE YOU. BE YOU AND BE TRUE.

thatgirl2011
New Member


Date Joined May 2011
Total Posts : 7
   Posted 5/4/2011 11:41 PM (GMT -6)   
Your story is really sad....Our parents seem to be a lot alike. I was kicked out when I was 15 by my mom...and was bounced back and forth between foster homes for a long time. My advice, get counseling. It really helped me out a lot. Remember, people do still care about u...and no matter what ur going thru, someone out there is always going thru something worse. I do believe that counseling would do a lot of good for you. And as far as college, look into some scholarships. You could even talk to a financial advisor at whichever college u choose to go to and try to work something out. A lot of times, they will help you get an on-campus job and a dorm. Everything always happens for a reason. And although you may not be able to see it now, something good will come out of what ur going through. It may take years, but something good will come out of it. If u ever need to talk u r more than welcome to come to me :) Stay strong and find a way to put a smile on ur face everyday!
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