Posted 6/21/2011 5:07 PM (GMT -6)
I've hit a new low. After living in [Far Away City] for 4 months, I got two job offers on the same day. I turned down the one that paid less, and took the one I found through a headhunter - the one I thought would be more stable. After being there exactly a week, I was fired. I didn't do anything that I can think of that was so extreme it would warrant getting fired after only a week, and all the feedback I got was "it's not a good fit". Logically, I know that this is better in the long-run; however, it's now been almost a month since I got fired, and I'm no closer to finding another job. I have to pay rent (on an apartment I only got because I was employed) and other bills, and am freaking out. My depression is back worse than ever, now that every fear I have is reinforced by my circumstances. My older sister came to visit this past weekend from the other side of the country, and I felt like a terrible hostess/sister. I realized I can't even be happy for other people. She has a great job, an amazing boyfriend, and plenty of friends; why can't I be happy for her?
It's Tuesday, and I felt so hopeless this morning that I drank the rest of a bottle of wine that was in my fridge. Not a good sign.