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Date Joined Jun 2011
Total Posts : 1
   Posted 6/28/2011 6:07 PM (GMT -6)   
i am having trouble letting go of someone who was very close to me. Even though we were only ever friends there was potential to be much more than that and he made this perfectly clear about a month ago. I know its silly right hanging onto something that truly never got started but I cannot seem to get him off my mind and continually wonder what if?
What if this would have been the best relationship of my life? What if he was the "one"? What if I never find someone else like him in my life? Will I be alone forever?
You see I have an inability to see what I have right in front of me and that prevents me from enjoying and seizing certain options and opportunities that life presents to me. All I want to do is be near this guy and not be alone or left with my thoughts like this but I don't have the balls nor do I know how he would respond to this so I will not go. I know this makes me sound like some crazy girl but I think it has to do with what he said to me that night. He blamed everything on me. His destructive decisions, the random hook ups everything and then proceeded to tell me how in love he was with me for years and how I just never noticed. How was I suppose to notice something that was not apparent to me? He never asked me out on a date never really told me how he felt even though he claims he did and now here I am left in this limbo that no one seems to really understand.
Oh well. This is such a normal happening now this pain and loneliness and feelings of emptiness and regret I just want it to not only go away but for someone to tell me it will all be okay and that someone out there really understands. Sorry I guess it is really pathetic to hold onto all of this stuff I just don't know what to do to get myself feeling better again. I cant sleep I barely eat still and all i seem to do is lay on the couch and watch movies and television. I have become an in house bum and its driving me insane!

getting by
Forum Moderator

Date Joined Sep 2007
Total Posts : 42612
   Posted 6/28/2011 6:29 PM (GMT -6)   
It sounds like you could use some counseling to get some direction in your life. Holding on to dreams gets us nowhere in this situation. Are you afraid to tell him how you feel now? What is the worst thing that could happen? You really need to find yourself and know that you don't need anybody to make you a whole person. Then you can deal with the relationship aspect of it when it is time. But first work on you. It sounds like you are lacking a little in the self esteem department. Counseling works for that. And direction too. I highly recommend it.

Know that there will be many guys in your life. But if you really want this guy, let him know. But if he is blaming you for his problems, don't go for that. He did what he did on his own. Make him own that responsibility. Talk to him.

Hugs, Karen
Moderator-Depression and fibromyalgia

fibromyalgia, Chronic fatigue, depression, allergies
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