Thanks for all the encouragement folks. Please understand this and I will re-emphasize, I am not confused or unsure of what to do, trust me...I know the best avenue in a situation like this and I'm not trying to make my current situation any worse than it already has been. My spouse is really sweet as I remember, she just really lost touch with me with the things she was doing and I became just as frustrated if not more, but after several months and counseling we're at a different crossroads. Another woman is not my style, character or mindset. Yes I agree Karen it's nice to have other female friends (and I do), but not in the context of one of them wanting to be close to me. This was a very unusual occurrence for me, and I want to be transparent as I have been here in the forum with you guys, I must say it's flattering when someone else finds you interesting. The problem is when guys let that someone really get in their head...and then the trouble starts. Sorry, that's not for me. TRUST ME. I was born at night, but not last night!
So, thanks all for the comforting words. It's soooo nice to hear that there are still people out there with integrity, morals and decency. In this sex-crazed, nothing but stupid sex TV shows, cable shows and sex saturated talk (everywhere you go), high-profile affairs --it's nice to hear you guys chime out honest feelings and thoughts. I just wanted to throw what's been going on with me out there for you to hear, this is a great place to be accountable. So tell me what other men, besides myself want to be transparent about
something like this? We may not be a dime a dozen, but we're out here! That I know for sure. We may be few a far between, but a man who first respects himself and the character and legacy that he hopes to leave, should see enough of the degradation in relationships nowadays, in order to make him understand that he doesn't want to be another statistic, called a dog, and a jerk or a cheat. Give some of us a little credit.
But just as a request, keep me in your prayers. This is not an easy decision that I'll been facing with the spouse as far as reconciliation. Karen, I am being very careful and I'm not moving on feelings and emotions, I want to be sober in every way with consideration of my relationship with the spouse. Just because good words are spoken/heard by the other party, doesn't always mean that you just jump right back into things. Again I must say that she's had to have made some serious changes...it's not business as usual...and I don't think I'm being hard about
what I'm saying. I just know that I'm reaching another age milestone and I don't want to live the next many years regretting the choice I made to get back together. I do love her, but I'm also very serious about
the changes that have to be made. I have made so many great changes in my life in these last few months, I've surprised myself. I've even lost lots of weight. I was in the 200's, now I'm below 185lbs in just 3 months. No starches, breads, sugar or fatty foods. No calories in my drink, in other words just water. And I feel really good now. I've dropped a couple of waist sizes to prove it. No special diet, but just learning the discipline needed to lose and stay healthy. And afterall, I'm not 20 anymore. :)
Love to all.
Post Edited (youngmil) : 6/30/2011 11:34:49 PM (GMT-6)