This is just another BIG pill from my "DH" to swallow

Having2LeftFeet

Regular Member

Joined : Feb 2005

Posts : 472

Posted 3/21/2005 10:17 AM (GMT -7)

I haven't posted in a while because I rather enjoy reading and posting to other members since I feel like I am not "tooting" my own horn to speak. So far, this site has lived up to it's expectations as the staff said it would.

This is very troubling. My "DH" has been very "standoffish" lately. I use that term as far as in the bedroom. OK...so I am ill but I am not contageous nor will I break. He has been very suspicious and sneaky. He's on the internet all hours of the night. When I signed on this AM to clean my temp. internet files and cache, lo and behold I saw things I never thought I would ever see on MY internet. These things were in history as well. He doesn't even know how to cover his tracks.This is my computer. He has his own but doesn't like using it because it is on his companies network. This was going on for a while as the dates were back in Feb. When I signed on, I went to history and my GWAD I saw video's and pages and pictures that I would never want on my computer. I am a Christian woman just trying to get her life in order. It has taken a long time for me to get through some terrible ordeals. I feel ike Al Paccino. "Every time I think I am out, he pulls me back in". Between the alcohol abuse and this I feel like this is not a place I should be but then I don't feel I should be the one to leave since I didn't do anything wrong. This is not good. Times past my Doctor has seen me and he can tell when I am having a hard time just from my BP alone. He tells me this is not good for me and I should get rid of him and "kick him to the curb". Easier said than done. He hasen't done anything violent, he is rather passive. (now I know why) I am embrassed just seeing this trash on my computer. I am a Christian and this is a Christian computer. This is offensive, disgusting, embarrassing, trash and should not be allowed on the internet but the "love of money is the root of all evil". I am so angry my heart is pounding. I am hurt and feel betrayed. I am back down in the depression mode in dispair. Talk about doom and gloom. I haven't done anything for him to disrespect me like this. I have mentioned many times about, "making love", (God this is embarassing) and he has no reason why he doesn't. I need to get off here and pray on my knees. God forgive him. Please help me out here.

Hugs

H2LF

There is no such word as can't. Can't simply means wouln't. Grab as much as life as you can. Future is a long way away for those who don't believe. Don't build a foundation of life on sand. It will take it away with the tide. Love a little more, be unkind a lot less.

Post Edited (Having2LeftFeet) : 3/21/2005 6:04:47 PM (GMT-7)

RainDance

Regular Member

Joined : Mar 2005

Posts : 253

Posted 3/21/2005 10:25 AM (GMT -7)

H2LF..

This is a tough, intricate subject and, if you would like to, we can take it off line and go thru emails..

Do you have your computer password protected? Do you have your internet options set up to filter out those kinds of sites?

What OS do you run?

I'm a Christian too, taught the College and Career class for our church and a family home bible study, was the church sec'y and director of the Food Ministry. Not all at the same time.. ! haha..

So, if you want to talk off line, let me know.

There are things you can do.

God Bless..

RainDance

We get through this one day at a time.. :)

Having2LeftFeet

Regular Member

Joined : Feb 2005

Posts : 472

Posted 3/21/2005 5:50 PM (GMT -7)

Hi, Rain Dance,

Yes to everything you asked. I am really stuck here with this one and I feel like I am not in control of what's happening. I don't trust him anymore. I am sad and disheartened. Please, off site is good for me. Your help would be appreciated.

God bless

RainDance

Regular Member

Joined : Mar 2005

Posts : 253

Posted 3/21/2005 7:20 PM (GMT -7)

Hi H2LF..

I don't do Live Chats or IM as they both let down the safety features of your computer.

I will be glad to talk with you as I know this, especially for a Christian, is almost impossible to deal with.

I'll wait to hear from you..

Take care and God Bless..

RainDance

We get through this one day at a time.. :)

Post Edited (RainDance) : 3/22/2005 9:52:57 AM (GMT-7)

Having2LeftFeet

Regular Member

Joined : Feb 2005

Posts : 472

Posted 3/24/2005 2:24 AM (GMT -7)

Hi, Rain Dance,

I wrote you an E mail to the address you gave me. Did you get it? If not, I will try to locate it and resend. Thanks for your support. Hugs

H2LF

RainDance

Regular Member

Joined : Mar 2005

Posts : 253

Posted 3/24/2005 11:28 AM (GMT -7)

Hi there

Well, I did get one initial one from you and sent a pretty long reply within a few minutes.

My daughter and one other very dear friend have asked me why I haven't responded to their emails and so, I'm thinking there is something wrong with my ISP.. (Ugggg.. !)

I will re-send the answer and hope you get that one.

Here is another address to resend anything else you have tried to get thru.

james.muzzy@comcast.net Make sure the dot (.) is in there.. :)

Let's see if that works. Really sorry that there seems to be a glitch with the system and I really do want to talk with you.

Hope we connect this time.. take care..

RainDance

We get through this one day at a time.. :)

Post Edited (RainDance) : 3/24/2005 12:07:20 PM (GMT-7)

limsy

New Member

Joined : Mar 2005

Posts : 5

Posted 3/25/2005 4:33 AM (GMT -7)

h2lf...

u have to remember to look after yourself first before you can help others.. what your doctor says is right, its most likely if this person is affecting your health they won't hang around to help you pick up the pieces should u become ill.... therefore before you can consider DH's diffuculties you must ensure that you are in a strong enough place to make your stand.. its hard sometimes seeing the effect that being down has on others but its important that you look after yourself first so that if necessary you can help DH through whatever he's going through.. all the best hunny... it'll all work out the way God intended in the end.. xxx

CheerDad

Veteran Member

Joined : Apr 2004

Posts : 2284

Posted 3/25/2005 9:46 AM (GMT -7)

Just adding that I would be willing to visit with you off-line concerning this issue. It is not an easy one to capture in an open forum like this. My e-mail link is active if you would like an additional perspective.

We can respond to irritation with a smile instead of scowl, or by giving warm praise instead of icy indifference. By our being understanding instead of abrupt, others, in turn, may decide to hold on a little longer rather than to give way. Love, patience, and meekness can be just as contagious as rudeness and crudeness.

Randy

Ralph

Regular Member

Joined : Aug 2004

Posts : 139

Posted 3/29/2005 6:45 AM (GMT -7)

H2LF

I may be of assistance to you. I would have to be on an e mail, as I would not want to discuss it on this forum. I don't know how to proceed though.

I would like to contact others too, but just don't know how.

RainDance

Regular Member

Joined : Mar 2005

Posts : 253

Posted 3/29/2005 10:01 AM (GMT -7)

Ralph,

If you click on the person's (blue) name in the left side of the post, it will take you to their information page. If they have and email available, or any other contact, it will be listed there.

Also, there are buttons just under their name in the post which will take you there.

RainDance

Don't forget.. Drink your water.. :)

Ralph

Regular Member

Joined : Aug 2004

Posts : 139

Posted 3/29/2005 2:28 PM (GMT -7)

Thanks RainDance, I knew you would know.

RainDance

Regular Member

Joined : Mar 2005

Posts : 253

Posted 3/30/2005 8:51 AM (GMT -7)

Haha.. No problem Ralph, at least I know I'm good for Something.. ! haha..

RainDance

Don't forget.. Drink your water.. :)

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This is just another BIG pill from my "DH" to swallow

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