My mother makes me feel inferior

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Date Joined Jul 2011
Total Posts : 1
   Posted 7/21/2011 4:57 PM (GMT -6)   
During my life my mother had a way of making me feel like I was nothing. But in this dispute she makes me feel that I'm the worse daughter that she could of had. All because I simply told her to keep it down cause' I barely get any sleep.

She has told everyone she has been talking to that I'm rude, selfish etc. And with my already low self esteem she makes me feel even worse. She's threatened to hit me several times during the day and I don't know how much I can take. I already feel like self harming just to take the pain away. And she's not open to reason.

I already have resentment towards her for pushing my brother away. And I feel like she's doing the same to me... I feel like I'm starting to hate her after 15 years of being put down.

Post Edited (Shanari) : 7/21/2011 4:04:44 PM (GMT-6)

getting by
Forum Moderator

Date Joined Sep 2007
Total Posts : 42612
   Posted 7/21/2011 6:34 PM (GMT -6)   
Hi Shanari,

First of all, welcome to the HeaingWell Depression forum. I am really glad that you have joined us. Are you going to any counseling? I would highly suggest that to get your self esteem up. You do need that. I know it hurts when our mothers say mean things to us. And get physical too. You don't have to take the abuse. You really should talk to somebody about that.

The one thing though. People can't MAKE us feel anything unless we LET them. I know these things hurt coming from your mother. After all our mothers are who we look up to and want approval from. Mine told me many times she wished she never would have had me. And it made me feel bad. But I learned how to not let it get to me. Basically I stayed away from her. I don't know if you can do that. But don't let anybody make you feel less than you are. You are a good person. Know that. And you don't deserve to feel less. But you have to put that into your head and live it.

We can't discuss self harm on the forum. So please don't mention it. Thank you in advance. There is a book called "feeling good" or "the new mood therapy" by Dr. David Burns. Reading it really helped me and many others. I think it would be a good book to read.

If your mother is physically (and even emotionally) abusing you. I think you should call child protective services. You don't have to live that way. Being in fear all the time. Let us know.

I hope that you feel better soon.

Hugs, Karen
Moderator-Depression and fibromyalgia

fibromyalgia, Chronic fatigue, depression, allergies

Regular Member

Date Joined Jan 2011
Total Posts : 96
   Posted 7/21/2011 10:43 PM (GMT -6)   
Shanari, please don't get discouraged with life because of your Mother, sometimes parents may get egotistical and I know this from experience.
My mum is a complete Bwhat and I happen to don't see her as often as I should, but thats ok I still love her in a conditional manner.
My father can also belittle me but I can also do the same, his support is great and I do appreciate it. But I know what you mean, I get really angry when people condescend me as I have spoken to Karen about at one stage because it was starting to really upset me.
Unfortunately in life, everyone is different and has different point of views and personalities, don't feel worthless because you are not.
People all around the globe don't get along with their parents as best as they would wish, but thats ok because keep in mind this will only back fire when they want support when they are older.
You have other family, maybe your brother perhaps? So you are not alone, please don't let trivial crap get to you as I know it happens in my family yearly.
Be the bigger and stronger person and take control of your life, whether that be getting a job and moving out and enjoying life.
There is alot of exciting things in life I would like to see you experience, please don't think of throwing it all away because there are positives in this life that keep us going.

Love from Australia

Diagnosis - Ankylosing Spondilitis and (still to come, ill find something :P)
Meds - Celebrex 200mg Once daily - Contains Celecoxib.

Melbourne, Australia
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