Ive just joined this forum, because I need to talk to someone that won't judge me. I'm a stay at home mom, and a Army wife. I've struggled with depression for as long as I can remember, but right at this moment it's the worse that it's ever been! My husband is deployed, I'm home alone with both of our kids one of which is severally handicapped, and I'm 15 hrs away from any family! I can sleep at night, and when I do finally sleep I don't want to wake up. I feel like a horrible mother! My 3 yr old ate a Frozen toaster strudels the other day because I was still asleep at noon and he was hungry, and my little girl (5) who is special needs was soaking wet still in her bed!! I need help but I'm emberressed at the state my life is in. My house is a wreak, I've not had a single person to my house in months, and no one even checks on me.