Fiance just left

New Topic Post Reply Printable Version
[ << Previous Thread | Next Thread >> ]

Silver FreeFall
New Member


Date Joined Jul 2011
Total Posts : 3
   Posted 7/29/2011 12:44 PM (GMT -6)   
I'm feeling extremely lost in the world right now. I have close to no friends and my family cant help. I'm feeling horribly lost and depressed. My anxiety acts up and I almost have panic attacks. I really need help. So if anyone could please help me, I would really appreciate it.

getting by
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Sep 2007
Total Posts : 42609
   Posted 7/29/2011 1:05 PM (GMT -6)   
Hi Silver FreeFall,

Welcome to the HealingWell Depression forum. I am so glad that you have joined us, but am sorry about your circumstances. And it is especially hard when you don't have anybody that you can talk to.

For the near panic attacks, focus on your breathing when they come on. Breathe in through the nose and out through the mouth. This is called smelling the roses and blowing out the candles. Control your breaths. Do this about ten times, and see if it helps you any. Know in your mind that you are going to be okay. And that it is just panic which stems from fear. I think it is the fear of the unknown.

How long were you and your fiance together? Were you close to getting married? What were the circumstances? Were you living together when he left? Did he tell you or leave you a note? I am really sorry about your situation. It must of not have meant to be. But if you tell us a little more, maybe we can help you to feel better. How old are you? You sound young. And know that you have many good years ahead of you. Though I know it doesn't feel that way right now. You will meet somebody else and probably forget about this guy in the future. I know that doesn't help probably to hear that now, but it is the truth.

Please post back and tell us a little more about your situation so we can help you some. I know it feels like the end of the world right now, but it isn't. Things will get better for you. Keep posting.

Hugs, Karen
Moderator-Depression and fibromyalgia


fibromyalgia, Chronic fatigue, depression, allergies

Silver FreeFall
New Member


Date Joined Jul 2011
Total Posts : 3
   Posted 7/29/2011 1:44 PM (GMT -6)   
Hi, thanks for replying. It really means a lot to me to know someone actually wants to take the time to listen or better yet read what I have to say. My fiance and I were together since we were kids. On/off for about 8 to 9 years. We just hit it off but things went through the bad and the good and to her for the past while it seems like the bad has outweighed the good and I don't think so. We got into an argument one day over something just stupid and she shoved her ring into my chest and told me to take it back. Since then I have just been a complete wreck.

I'm 19 years old and was recently medically discharged from the army for anxiety and depression because of the state my home life was in when I left. I've never been able to forgive myself for letting myself get to that point. I came home on Christmas leave and asked her then and at first things were great. We were really happy but since I was discharged things just haven't been good and she finally left me and won't really talk to me. She says I was to clingy and possessive which was true and it drove her away. I don't want to be like this anymore. I want to change and I hate change. Sort of like a double-edged sword I guess. I just don't know what to do. She was all I had in my life, now I don't even have that.

Thanks,
Silver,

getting by
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Sep 2007
Total Posts : 42609
   Posted 7/29/2011 2:04 PM (GMT -6)   
Silver,

I probably sound like a broken record to everybody else because I always recommend counseling. Yes, change is hard, but being too clingy turns women off. to put it bluntly. But one thing in life, there will always be change. This is where the counselor comes in handy. They teach you how to get past that and feel confident. They guide you through a healing process. And I think that this would be good for you.

It really takes us off guard when somebody does this to us. We are shocked for one and hurt for another. It is a double edged sword. And it takes time to get over. I suggest you start taking interest in activities that you enjoy, hook up with a counselor. You might need a referal from your doctor, I am not sure. There are also a couple of fee sites that I will post for you that help with depression.

http://moodgym.anu.edu.au/welcome
http://ecouch.anu.edu.au/welcome

Juist copy and paste one in your browser and see if they help you. Though I would rather see you try counseling, this might help a little with your situation right now.

Like you said, change is hard. And you just took a huge blow. Especially for as long as you were close. But there will be other people in and possibly out of your life again. So hang in there, you are still young and have a lot of living to do.

Take care,

Hugs, Karen
Moderator-Depression and fibromyalgia


fibromyalgia, Chronic fatigue, depression, allergies

Silver FreeFall
New Member


Date Joined Jul 2011
Total Posts : 3
   Posted 7/29/2011 3:18 PM (GMT -6)   
Thank you for replying again. I appreciate the websites and I am going to try my best to make it through them to help myself and as far as counseling goes? I cant afford it. I have no health insurance and no job. I've just been making it off of savings for what few bills I do have. Thats sort of how I came here. I was looking for free help. I know as rare as that is or if it even exists really. Like I said before, I'm truly lost right now. But then again I am thankful for the help I have been given by you. Some help is better than no help I suppose.

getting by
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Sep 2007
Total Posts : 42609
   Posted 7/29/2011 3:40 PM (GMT -6)   
I hope the websites work for you. There are alternative solutions though I believe if they don't. You can go to your department of human services and apply for help. There is also a drug discount card that I can get the website for.
http://www.needymeds.org/drugcard/index.shtml

Just copy and paste that into your browser and see where it takes you.

Often mental health facilities will work on a sliding scale too. Which means that you only have a small fee, if any, to pay. So do check into that.

What are you going to do when your savings runs out? You might want to start looking for a job before your money runs out. They are hard to find these days, but summer is easier than winter.

Best wishes to you.

Hugs, Karen
 
PS  I tried to go to that site of the drugcard, but got an error on page, sorry.  I will see if I can find another one for you...
Moderator-Depression and fibromyalgia


fibromyalgia, Chronic fatigue, depression, allergies

Post Edited (getting by) : 7/29/2011 2:44:40 PM (GMT-6)

New Topic Post Reply Printable Version
Forum Information
Currently it is Tuesday, September 18, 2018 6:02 PM (GMT -6)
There are a total of 3,004,432 posts in 329,145 threads.
View Active Threads


Who's Online
This forum has 161738 registered members. Please welcome our newest member, Rosheen.
204 Guest(s), 10 Registered Member(s) are currently online.  Details
JoHnGaMeR90, Kent M., island time, Ss800, jberda1, John-Can, Korissa, Relentlesswill, brucen36, Mamatomypeas