I think you and I probably feel very similar. MIne was on meds. but they didn't seem to be making much of a difference anymore. When he was stressed (which is a lot lately) he was still acting out plus the meds. were affecting his memory/clarity of mind. Now that he has been goign off them, things are like they used to be with him being a jerk every night. So it's just a different form of personality issues than when he was on meds. But he was horrible then too, though the accusatory/paranoid stuff at least stopped. That is what he is back to acting out again now. Picks fights, blames me. But when we move I hope I can ignore him better.
We don't have kids. I have been waiting to get some stability. It's hard becuase being a mother was one of my greatest desires in life. He is better than he used to be, but obviously, not like I have an ideal situation to bring kids into. A big reason why we havn't.
I have ptsd and fibromyalgia so I can't work much, but I am doing some part time work from home now. That makes me feel good.
I'm sorry your h is not doing his part in providing. That is so frustrating! Mine is also on disability. He works from home, but he is unable to structure his time well and basically just goes with the flow. And the more he makes the more he spends! He refuses to budget. I married him before I really knew enough to make a good decision. That's part of it - it was long distance. Friends for years. But never had any idea what he was actually like...until after. And then, I felt stuck. Oh well, I'm here now, and I just want to find a way to be happy in spite of all this.
Anyway, that is another vent I guess. Aside from all that, let me say that it is nice meeting you. I am glad you have your daughter, so you have a light in your life. :0)
I feel for you, and hope it gets better. I hope your h will get back on meds. for your sake. Mine...well, like I said, they weren't helping anymore anyway...
But life goes on. And so will we.
Karen, thank-you for writing me back. You always have a helpful perspective on things.
Post Edited (manyembers) : 10/10/2011 8:23:16 AM (GMT-6)