Embers- are you out there?

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bayoub2
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Date Joined Sep 2006
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   Posted 10/21/2011 10:00 AM (GMT -6)   
Hey Embers
I realized I had not heard from you in a few days...this can be a good thing or a bad thing.. would you please post and let us know how it is going.
 
Maggie

manyembers
Regular Member


Date Joined Dec 2006
Total Posts : 424
   Posted 10/21/2011 11:01 AM (GMT -6)   
Hi Maggie,

Wow. That is so nice of you to check on how I'm doing. I go for long spurts where I am on the forum, off the forum, post a bit, or mostly read and stuff. Not very consistent, but still around. But I have been reading a bit and really glad to see you and your daughter seem to be doing better. Been crazy busy still - house stuff. oh, ugh. but getting there.

It is, as it always is, up and down with husband person. He had a couple better days. Another fight this morning. The house will be done next week for the most part and we can start moving soon, which means less confrontation with him (hopefully) since we won't have all these decisions to make non-stop, of which we almost always disagree at some point.

But in other areas, things are okay.

I got a juicer in the mail yesterday that I tested on a few veggies. Today I am hoping to get a nice batch of veggie juice made. It helps me with my energy a lot and hence, also my moods. So that is my project for today.

What about you? GOt any projects or enjoyable moments on the go today?

And you, Karen, what ya up to today? Did you get frost where you are? It went below freezing here last night and we had frost this morning. bummer. I wanted autumn to last at least until um, well, a lot longer...guess I was getting spoiled by all the nice weather. :0)

Anyone else? You getting wintery temps. where you are? I suppose our aussie friends are enjoying nice warm days...I will try not to be jealous! wink

embers

bayoub2
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Date Joined Sep 2006
Total Posts : 2861
   Posted 10/21/2011 11:14 AM (GMT -6)   
Hey girl
glad to hear from you....yes, finishing house will take a big burden off. I remember Pat and I making 100s of decisions every day-exhausting.

Hubby and katie are at war, and I am a peacemaker, so it hurts so bbad. BUT, Pat went camping w/ a friend for the night and Katie has a sleepover so I am reveling in my solitude-so peaceful. So, cleaned the filing cabinet -whew!! My sister comes to visit so I'm trying to finish my bedroom (no longer in same room ) So happy piddling and hanging with 2 dogs who don't ever yell at me -lol

In the 40s this am, but 78 today so glorious weather.

Hope things continue pretty smoothly for you....Karen is probably cooking something else today. Yesterday, we had some great chiken soup

Take care my friends

Maggie

getting by
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Sep 2007
Total Posts : 42439
   Posted 10/21/2011 11:49 AM (GMT -6)   
Our high today is in the 40's. I envy your 78 degrees. Send some this way, would you?

Since I made all that chicken soup, I don't have to cook today because we will have that again. But I think that the next will be either a beef roast, or chili. But hubby said he would make the chili, I don't think he likes mine. He likes it soupier, I like it thick. He says I don't put enough soup in the soup. I always make it thick. I love stew, and I make that thick too. I just don't get full on soupy soup. lol...

Maggie, I hope you enjoy your time alone. It is always nice to have the house to oneself. And no drama or arguing. I really hope that you are able to relax and enjoy.

You guys, I can't believe it is Friday already and the weekend is upon us. My the time goes by fast. Anyway, I hope you both have a good one.

Hugs, Karen
Moderator-Depression and fibromyalgia


fibromyalgia, Chronic fatigue, depression, allergies

manyembers
Regular Member


Date Joined Dec 2006
Total Posts : 424
   Posted 10/21/2011 5:57 PM (GMT -6)   
lol! I just got an e-mail from a friend for a 'chicken stoop' recipe i.e. thick chicken soup. It must be in the air. :0)

Maggie, I'm glad you have some quiet time. It is tiring being the peacemaker. I had a revelation about that the other day which is that, although it seems like we are just always putting out fires and the fires don't stop, without a peacemaker, they would blaze way higher and do much more damage. So hanging in there and doing what we can is better than just throwing up our hands and letting crap happen, if that makes sense.

The house thing is beyond frustrating. They poured the driveway and hubby hired someone who is like a handiman I guess - a guy and his sons - and they didn't put any insullated blankets over it, and poured it when it was too cold. So it has no smooth looking finish on it, just all these rough stripes across it where it was brushed. And who knows how long it will take to cure now. I am so tired of so many problems. I could go on but I won't.

At least, like you said Karen it IS the week-end. Yay! We get our piano delivered tonight. Hoping that turns out well.

Oh Maggie, separate rooms here too. Actually started because of his snoring and when the fibro. was more of an issue and I couldn't get back to sleep after being awakened. Now it's still the snoring, but also I like that I have my own space.

take care you two,

embers

bayoub2
Veteran Member


Date Joined Sep 2006
Total Posts : 2861
   Posted 10/21/2011 6:55 PM (GMT -6)   
Yeah, it started when my insomnia was so bad, thrashing around and then they put me on a CPAP and Pat said oh no, not in my room. A gentleman would have taken the spare room but mine has no manners and I de,mand good manners from myself and Katie.


So I cleaned up in here a little bit got my candles going, having a ball...took an extra pain pill. Oh yeah, did I mention I finally have a new pain management dioc after 6 months of suffering (no matter depression was so bad) can't get in til end of Nov, but that 's ok. And if my husband thinks he's getting one single pill from me, he better check himself. He can go get shots in his spine and get his own pills. He said no way and I say "No way you get pills after the agony I have been thru.

Ok I'm switching to candle power and listen to Bach air string and revel in God's gift of music and art.

Hope you have a good night-sorry abiout the knucklehead contractors....we had our share-lol Good night all

Maggie

manyembers
Regular Member


Date Joined Dec 2006
Total Posts : 424
   Posted 10/21/2011 8:54 PM (GMT -6)   
Good for you Maggie. Candles and Bach. I used to do such things often before I got married. I guess it is the same for you in that your husband is home all day too. Mine works from home. He hardly ever goes out so his presence is here 24/7. I used to be upset he was on his computer all day and night, but I guess now at least I have a break from having to interact with him much. Just sure made for many lonely years. Now I've been going to a church in town, and started teaching piano lessons so I'm less lonely.

We got the piano moved to the house tonight. The movers were well equipped and did a very good job. We had a block of concrete only poured last night before the stairs and just dirt/earth leading up to that. Put plywood over hte concrete and somehow they managed to figure out a way to get the piano in the house. I was impressed.

We got a Heinzmand. It sounds very rich and lovely. I played after they moved it in. It was an interesting experience - feeling something so good and beautiful in the midst of something that has felt so antagonizing - the build etc. Music - like this beautiful glorious thing in the midst of chaos and suffering. Such is music...some music anyway.

I hope the new pain management dr. works out well. It sounds like you are doing better pain wise. When I had pain it seemed to be tied in with physiological depression. That was hard. So I'm glad you are finding relief!

Well another day done, and another week-end. Hope it's a kind one for us all.

embers

bayoub2
Veteran Member


Date Joined Sep 2006
Total Posts : 2861
   Posted 10/22/2011 6:38 AM (GMT -6)   
OH you christened your house with your piano playing, very nice and with no furniture, acoustics should be good....fill that house with music...it's hard for the ugly to come in when music is playinf.

My parents had a very bad divorce in my teens. My brother and sister would ask me to play the piano for them. They would sit and shut their eyes and drift away to a bettr place. I tell my daughter that too....close your eyes, the music will paint pictures for you.

It is soooo hard having hubby underfoot 24/7...we nip at each other like little ankle biting dogs. We had a big fight again and I told him I was calling a real estate lady and I am. Under Mississippi, if most of the money for house came from one person's inheritance, they get most of house (that inheritance that he blew thru was my father's long hard work and he never thought twice about) Well that was very ugly and not =very Christian so forgive me Lord for my cruel words, they come from pain. I'm already nervous wrexck about him coming home

Anyway, sorry for tje rant, but it helps to clarify things when you write them down
Have a nive weekend
Maggie

manyembers
Regular Member


Date Joined Dec 2006
Total Posts : 424
   Posted 10/22/2011 12:34 PM (GMT -6)   
Hi Maggie,

I have had small inheritances and I have hardly anything to show for them either because of him. I think we keep trusting because it's ingrained to try to make the marriage work. And because the husband naturally tends to dominate and lead it is hard to have the boundaries needed to not suffer harm if they suck at leadership etc..

I'm sorry for his disregard for the inheritance you recieved. I'm glad to know there is a law that could help put things right if you sell the house. I know the Lord can make a way when there seems to be no way. I pray He will lead you and His love will surround you on your journey.

Today I am trying to focus on not letting the emotion and thoughts of anger get a grip. Even if the way I feel about him is not good, I'm trying to distract myself again instead of feeding the anger since that just gets me riled up which isn't helping. Some days I need to express it, other days I need to ignore it - today is a trying to stay calm day. I have just never been to the point in this marriage where I know so fully I would rather be somewhere else...right when we have bought this house and are in huge debt because of crappy contractors etc. What timing. It hurts. But at least I am safe, warm, fed, have air to breathe...I will find joy in spite of these circumstances.

The house was supposed to fulfill a bunch of dreams. But it didn't turn out that way at all. I am finding reality hard to accept. Got to focus on teh things that ARE good and happy though.

I loved what you shared about music. How precious that you could play for your siblings at a time when they needed that. That is truly beautiful.

Well I guess I will get some late breakfast - lunch really. Have a nice day.

embers

bayoub2
Veteran Member


Date Joined Sep 2006
Total Posts : 2861
   Posted 10/22/2011 12:50 PM (GMT -6)   
Music has curative powers, so bang away embers. You're right about anger. There are days it is so self-destructive that we have to let go, let God (as they say). All that resentment uses up alot of our emotional reservoir, when we should be filling it with love, we pollute it with our anger. So, some days we peacefully coexist.

He was back early and Katie too...oh well, be grateful for what we have

Hope you have anice evening-might talk w/ docs tomorrow about ECTs??????

Maggie

getting by
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Sep 2007
Total Posts : 42439
   Posted 10/22/2011 2:02 PM (GMT -6)   
Hi Ladies,

I just wanted to pop in and share the good news... The sun is out today!!! It is fairly warm too. I just walked the dog. I am loving it. Got my trash out and got dishes yet to do. I am so slow when it comes to doing the dishes. I just had to share this (about the sun) because I have complained so much about the cloudy days.

I hope you are both having a good day today.

Hugs, Karen
Moderator-Depression and fibromyalgia


fibromyalgia, Chronic fatigue, depression, allergies

bayoub2
Veteran Member


Date Joined Sep 2006
Total Posts : 2861
   Posted 10/22/2011 3:12 PM (GMT -6)   
Sunny greetings to our sunny friend!! Besautiful here too see ya in the am

Maggie

manyembers
Regular Member


Date Joined Dec 2006
Total Posts : 424
   Posted 10/22/2011 9:37 PM (GMT -6)   
Hey Karen, I'm glad you are finally getting some sunshine there! The sun was out here today too. Our driveway finally looks like concrete - light grey - so it is curing. Yippee!

We had a guy from church come to finish the shower tiling and he said he'd come do the backsplashes too. He is one of several who is volunteering his time and work to help us complete the house since a lack of budget would have basically left us without tiles or flooring. I love my tiles! lol!

Maggie, I was thinking more about what you've shared about piano/classical music as I was coming home from the city tonight. I was there buying music books. Know that your posts re. music have inspired and comforted me.

I don't know anything about ECT, but I hope you will get the answers you need and good care. You deserve the best.

tc dear ladies, embers

bayoub2
Veteran Member


Date Joined Sep 2006
Total Posts : 2861
   Posted 10/23/2011 6:20 AM (GMT -6)   
thanks ember

Isat at computer last night looking for more-katie says "I like the sad ones"(like moonlightsonata. That will be her first piece learned When, you say? I haven't a clue lol
I wanted to study music therapy in college but could not afford the 1 univ that offered it back then.
It makes me feel so good that I helped reconnect you with nusic-it has been so important thru my life, the joyous and the grief stricken, music is there.
So, you go girl!!! I need a music player with ear buds so I can tune out some peoplelol have a gloriuos day
Maggie
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