Here is part of my dilemma with getting counseling and or going on depression meds. I'm not opposed to either of them, and either or both may be in my future. Right now my wife is in a much worse state and as crazy as it may sound, I think she needs me to be "ok" right now. We're a blended family, living in the house I had before we married with 2 of my kids (adult daughter who moved back home after graduating from college, soon to be married, and my youngest daughter who is a senior in high school). Parenting is a huge source of conflict with more intricacies than I could possibly explain. Obviously, we both feel totally justified in our positions and yes family counseling could possibly help.
Either because of our conflict or alongside our conflict my wife is very withdrawn and depressed and I want her to get individual counseling to get her to a place where couples counseling could even have a chance of success. I view our conflict as only half (at the most) of her depression trigger because she has 2 grown kids living some distance away and they make her feel marginalized, her daughter in particular. I honestly don't see couples counseling as being of any benefit right now because everything that is said to her is heard through a filter that totally changes the meaning. Sometimes I am utterly amazed when she tells me what she "heard" in a conversation when I was there and also heard every word spoken. Ok, maybe I am the one detached from reality. Suffice to say, we can both be present for a conversation and we both walk away having heard something entirely different. I've spoken words and heard words spoken to her from others that are totally supportive and intended to be encouraging and complimentary and later hear her tell me that what she heard was insulting. She needs, in my opinion, to get enough individual help that she is able to hear words of affirmation and encouragement when they are plainly spoken to her.
It may be a rationalization, but it's my story and I'm sticking with it.
p.s. diet and nutrition do play a big role, and eating healthy, much the same as you described, is how I lost the weight and kept it off. I now occasionally indulge, and sometimes even overindulge but for the most part I eat a very healthy diet and exercise regularly.
Post Edited (blue4noreason) : 10/31/2011 1:12:16 PM (GMT-6)